Screening Dead Ahead

I won't tell you what movie I am going to see right now, thereby abandoning you for the remainder of today, but I will give you a couple of visual "clues." We'll see if you can put them together and suss out the movie I am seeing. I have faith in you guys! You're all real bright and I have even been told that your mothers loved some of you. Anyway it's true, I'm gone, another day is gone, our lives are gone. In three days it's Halloween and what do we have to show for it? Fat load'a nothin' that's what. On that cheerful note I will be here all day tomorrow (unless I, you know, die) AND I have one final NYFF 2025 review landing at Pajiba -- if not later today than tomorrow, but whenever it is I will make sure to link that shit up. So there is something to look forward to after all! Sunshine and gummy bears and oral sex forever!

Ride 'Em, RPattz

Something might be getting stiff but it sure ain't my love, Rob! Ahem. Anyway Robert Pattinson in a cowboy hat and a gold chain -- who knew?? Well I guess Lynne Ramsay knew. Anyway this movie is supposedly out in like two weeks but I'm starting to think it doesn't actually exist? I'm always down for a Ramsay jam dammit -- You Were Never Really Here remains one of the greatest cinematic achievements of the new century. Here's the Die My Love trailer if you haven't watched it yet:

Nobody Puts Madsy in the Corner

Well it's that time! What time? Time for me to head off to places unknown (read: my couch) for five straight days. It's a holiday weekend here in the U.S. and I'm off until next Wednesday. I put in the work this past week though -- I reviewed the new Indiana Jones (here), I reviewed the new Jennifer Lawrence (here), I reviewed the new Rock Hudson bio-pic (here), I reviewed the new Wes Anderson (here), and I reviewed a forthcoming Jude Law (here). Oh and I answered the question of which role of Harrison Ford's was the hottest right here. PLUS I have a big piece that has not been not published yet which I will update the site with a link to over the break. That's a lotta goddamned writing y'all and I ready for that goddamned couch.

But like I did just say -- I will be updating the site a little bit over the break; not just that coming piece (heh I said "coming piece") but there's our annual July 4th ridiculousness as well, which will land on (you guessed it) July 4th. So come back and visit over the break for these and perhaps other surprises! Or per usual keep your eyes on my social media accounts -- it's not like I'll be off of those for longer than five seconds. Have a happy 4th, y'all! And even more importantly -- Happy 11 to Magic Mike!

Yes Feelings

I know the online contingent of Jennifer Lawrence haters is vocal, but I cannot stand with you -- I love Jennifer Lawrence. I have loved her since Winter's Bone, I have loved her through falling on the Oscar stairs and making poop jokes and her stealing Nicholas Hoult away from me. We have been through it! She is a bonafide movie star and we need that shit and I am happy we have her. And I am glad we have her back after a little break with an actual honest-to-goodness comedy -- click here to read my review of No Hard Feelings at Mashable. (This went up on Friday but I wasn't here to link to it on Friday so y'all get it now.) The movie is stupid and cheesy and I laughed my ass off anyway. It is what it is, people!

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

X-Men: First Class (2011)

Erik: What brings you to Argentina?

1st German: The climate. I'm a pig farmer.

2nd German: Tailor, since I was a boy.

My father made the best suits in Dusseldorf.

Erik: My parents came from Dusseldorf.

1st German: What was their name?

Erik: They didn't have a name. It was taken 

from them, by pig farmers and tailors.

Matthew Vaughn's soft reboot of the X-Men movies premiered in NYC on this day 10 years ago and let me tell you that everything involving Michael Fassbender and James McAvoy remains golden. 

A lot of the other stuff maybe doesn't work, looking back now -- Jennifer Lawrence seemed incredibly uncomfortable the entire time and never found Mystique's groove, leaving us longing for Rebecca Romijn in a World Class First -- but Fassy & Jimmy made this entire run of movies worth their weight in millions. Especially when you add in all of their press flirtations...

A Time For Mothers

This still feels like kind of a weird time to wish people a Happy Mother's Day because there is still -- in case you'd forgotten or maybe you just woke up from a coma (in which case I love that you came to MNPP first!) -- a pandemic happening, and relational activities should remain constrained. No parties, people. But personally I am now a vaccinated person, and my mother and my grandmother are now vaccinated people, and so I am going to upstate New York next week to see them for the first time since... like nearly two years ago? I'm pretty emotional about it, don't get me started! But that's not this weekend, that's next week, and I'll surely mention it when it's happening. For some of you though, maybe you're safely seeing your Moms this weekend? And it's to you people, and to all the actual Moms, that I say Happy Mother's Day. Also Bye til Monday!

Look Up Timmy

I was more concerned with getting situated at my desk this morning when I shared the great big Timmy GQ profile than I was with thinking through what I was typing and so I didn't realize there was other Chalamet news which I should have included -- thankfully I've got images from GQ's behind-the-scenes video of their photoshoot to share, to go along with this other news! I really blew my wad otherwise sharing all those pictures at once. 

Anyway the other news is Timmy got a new job! He's one among a ton of huge names to attach themselves to (ugh) Vice director Adam McKay's new movie for Netflix. It's called Don't Look Up and it's about "two low-level astronomers who embark on a media tour to warn mankind of an approaching asteroid that will destroy Earth." 

The other names attached? Just a buncha schmoes like Leonardo DiCaprio, Cate Blanchett, Jonah Hill, Himesh Patel, Ariana Grande, Kid Cudi, Matthew Perry, Tomer Sisley, and Jennifer Lawrence. (I'd never heard of Sisley before but hey he's cute.) Of course McKay gathers up gigantic casts like this every time out and then makes offensively shitty movies (see also The Big Short, or even better, don't) so I don't know how excited I am about this. Maybe if Timmy gets to act with Blanchett, that'll be cool.

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

Winter's Bone (2010)

Ree: He ain't gon' say nothing to me?

Merab: If you're listening, child, you got your answer. 

Isn't it weird to realize that we've only had Jennifer Lawrence in our lives for ten years? Ten years to the day because this movie came out in limited release on June 11th 2010 and that there's another surprise because why the hell did Winter's Bone come out in June? I suppose that the term "counter-programming" was the term of the day and I suppose it worked too because this little movie somehow managed to score four Oscar nominations including Best Picture (!!) not to mention the first of four nominations for Jen-Law herself. And while the other two nominations, for Debra Granik (for Screenplay) and John Hawkes (for Supporting Actor), look real good here on a decade out I have got to say -- "Justice for Dale Dickey!" She's the real force behind this movie working so well if you ask me. Not that I've re-watched it since 2010 -- have any of you?

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

Red Sparrow (2018)

Dominika: I think one day you will understand.
Nate Nash: No, I don't think I will. Some things
can't be sacrificed. We don't throw people away.

I think I'm one of about ten people in the entire world who totally enjoyed the ridiculous spy fest Red Sparrow, but then I did have an awful obnoxious father with his teen girls sitting next to me and watching his world crumble as he realized this Jennifer Lawrence vehicle, full of rape and nudity and murder, was not the latest Hunger Games movie, well, that was a lot of entertainment value in itself. Funny how vividly I can recall that entire experience today! Twas a delight. 

Anyway as Mr. Nate Nash just said we don't throw people away, so -- where the heck are you, Jennifer Lawrence? The Oscar winning actress has only been seen scowling her way though Dark Phoenix under several pounds of Smurf make-up this year -- I keep asking where her X-costar Michael Fassbender's gotten himself to, I feel I should flip the script, ask about Jen here on her 29th birthday. We loved mother!, Jen!

Of course she's not really going anywhere and those of us who do like her really have nothing to worry about -- she remains a massive movie star, where Fassy's still, even with those Mutant Movies on his resume, considered a Thespian, a designation that's way more disposable in this disposable day and age than an honest to goodness movie star. Jen's got three projects lined up -- the bio-pic of psycho pretrendress Elizabeth Holmes should make for good cinema (until you see it's Vice director Adam McKay who's directing, true and total barf)...

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... but it's her Married-to-the-Mob-esque movie Mob Girl with The Great Beauty and The Young Pope genius Paolo Sorrentino that I'm most curious about. It's based on the 1992 book about real-life moll Arlyne Brickman, who ran with the Colombo crime family in the 50s and 60s and eventually turned FBI informant when the thugs threatened her daughter. It sounds like a great story, and seeing Sorrentino turn his eye on the typical Scorsese Territory of mid-century New York gangsters could really be something.

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Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

mother! (2017)

HIHIM: You won't hurt much longer.
Mother: What hurts me the most is that I wasn't enough.
HIM: It's not your fault. Nothing is ever enough.
I couldn't create if it was. And I have to. That's what I do.
That's... what I am. Now I must try it all again.

I still can't believe this movie happened. I mean that with the utmost admiration. It is a blessing, my ridiculous experience getting to see the premiere at Radio City Music Hall was a blessing - we been blessed! All the exclamation points! I hate that Jennifer Lawrence and Darren Aronofsky broke up after this movie came out -- I wanted them to make twenty increasingly insane movies together. Although... this one sets an awfully high bar for "insane" so I don't know how you'd leap-frog this beginning. I guess perhaps they got that. Well now that we've all learned a valuable lesson in real time about the relationship between those two I suppose I should do what I came here for -- to wish Javier Bardem a happy 50th birthday. Happy day, Mr. Bardem!

The Power of Fassy Compels You

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Until recently I'd thought that Bryan Singer had directed the forthcoming Dark Phoenix movie, and I was gearing myself up for all the fun that those press rounds were gonna represent -- but no Dark Phoenix is the directorial debut of writer and producer Simon Kinberg. (And wow, imagine making your directorial debut with a 265 million dollar budget -- what a world.) But I imagine folks like Nicholas Hoult and Evan Peters, who've worked with Singer a few times, will probably still get asked, so prep your answers, boys! (Speaking of Sir Ian finally got on the record about that.) Anyway we're not here for Bryan Singer we're here for the new trailer for Dark Phoenix, which was not I repeat not directed by Bryan Singer. And it sure is nice to see Michael Fassbender acting!

Or at least standing around with an angry face while the CG things surrounding him are filled in later, anyway. But we should cherish these moments because dude hasn't acted a single minute since this thing was filmed and as far as we can tell might not do it again, either. (Please prove us wrong, Fassy. We'd love to be wrong.) Here's the trailer:

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Dark Phoenix is out on June 7th.
What do we think of the trailer?

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Fassy's Final X

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I could be wrong because I haven't been paying a ton of attention but this is the first official shot that I can think of seeing of Michael Fassbender & Nick Hoult and so forth for X-Men: Dark Phoenix, the upcoming super-mutant flick that's out on June 7th. The pics, including the one below, come via here where they're also saying we'll probably get a trailer with the Super Bowl. Which reminds me - there's like a Super Bowl happening some time soon, isn't there? I have absolutely no idea, this is the first time I have thought of it since I avoided last year's. Anyway it's good to see Michael Fassbender is really my main point. Who knows if we'll ever see him act again, the way things be going...

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... learning my strokes with Joel Edgerton.

I know reactions to Red Sparrow were all over the map but I personally dug it - here's my review - so if you missed it in theaters (and seeing as how it made under fifty million here in the US I think you might have missed it) here's my heads-up that it's hitting blu-ray in a couple of weeks and you could do worse. Give it a whirl! If nothing else it will punch your pleasant idea of Katniss Everdeen in the windpipe and who doesn't want that...

Little Bird's Fallen Out of That Nest Now

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It's possible that I got some of my enjoyment from watching the father of three teen girls who was sitting in front of me (who I already hated because I'd gotten into an argument with him about his phone at the start) become steadily more horrified and embarrassed about the movie he had brought his little girls to - nope, this ain't the new Hunger Games, dude! But I sure do have to say I did have a good time with Red Sparrow last night. He was trying to grow a third hand with which to shield each of his kid's eyes while I got to guffaw behind him at Jennifer Lawrence barking "You sent me to Whore School!" at Matthias Schoenaerts. A perfect night on the town.

In all seriousness Red Sparrow reads like a fabulously dark companion piece to Atomic Blonde to me - the latter film trades sometimes too hard in the fun of its implausible and sexy ass-kicking fantasia; for all of the astonishing brutality that is heaped upon Charlize Theron her character still reads as an Ice Queen Terminator, unstoppable in her fashionable high-kicks and slouch-shouldered sweater sets. Red Sparrow meanwhile, while also a great big heaping over-the-top movie thing, reads more honest to me in the ways a female spy would really have to maneuver through the world... ways that are indeed hella depressing and disturbing.

The Hitchcockian score only underlines that Red Sparrow is intended as a modern-day Notorious - where Hitch could only hint at the bedroom seductions and compromises that Ingrid Bergman was being forced to surrender herself to all in the name of "patriotism" Red Sparrow goes full force De Palma with it, pouring magnificent Euro-sleaze over top of everything that Hitchcock could only suggest. So yes there is rape and sexual humiliation and yes it is at times very hard to watch. But I don't disbelieve the truth of that. Not even a smidge. Our governments, ones of every stripe, trade in our humanity every second of every day, churning us through the meat grinder in the name of God and Country (and Men). Red Sparrow makes a helluva Movie out of it. Beautiful and brutal and silly and stomach-churning all at once.

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

mother! (2017)

HIHIM: You won't hurt much longer.
Mother: What hurts me the most is that I wasn't enough.
HIM: It's not your fault. Nothing is ever enough.
I couldn't create if it was. And I have to. That's what I do.
That's... what I am. Now I must try it all again.

Jeez typing out dialogue from this movie with those character names really drives home the blistering pretentiousness of this movie - I say that with admiration, by the way! Darren Aronofsky, bless him, is not shy about pushing through and onto and upward, or downward, or sideways - whatever it takes to reach moments of bat-shit cinematic ecstasy. I was re-watching some clips of The Fountain earlier this week and dude is consistent in that much - we shouldn't be surprised about it. Anyway a happy 49th birthday to Javi!

I have no idea what this picture of him with Dev Patel is about 

but I like looking at it, even without context.
(Also go vote on our mother! poll at The Film Experience!)

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"You don't have any painkillers, do you?"

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Michelle Pfeiffer should have been nominated for an Oscar for this scene in mother! alone - the smirking insinuations! - but them schmucks lack imagination and so it will just have to go down in history, eventually, as one of the greatest performances of the year. It has good company among the AMPAS ignored, that's for sure. On that note today's "Beauty vs Beast" at The Film Experience is picking up the mother! slack from the Academy and giving Aronofsky's batshit-classic some love today - head over to vote between this legend here and the film's also terrific leading lady, who's got a new movie out this weekend that I'm very much looking forward to and yadda yadda let's just think about Michelle some more, clink clink...

My First Dorians

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Guess who's been admitted into GALECA: The Society of LGBTQ Entertainment Critics, you guys? If you guessed anyone other than me... well, you're really, really terrible at guessing games if you did that. I mean, really. But yes that's right, it's me, and I'm pleased as rainbow punch that they're having me. 

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Anyway my membership is super fresh but I managed to squeak on in just in time to vote for their 9th annual Dorian Awards, wherein the membership chooses their picks for the Best of the Year, and I'd like to pretend that my votes were the ones that turned this list into the top-tier batch of winners that it turned out to be. We did good!

Like I think you guys are safe in assuming that I'm pretty pleased that the "Film of the Year" and the "LGBTQ Film of the Year" prizes both went to Luca Guadagnino's Call Me By Your Name, while Best Actor and Best Supporting Actor went to Timothée & Michael Stuhlbarg. Meanwhile Greta Gerwig won Best Director for Lady Bird and Laurie Metcalf won for Best Supporting Actress! And Sally Hawkins won Best Actress for The Shape of Water! I cosign every bit.
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I was also pretty happy to see God's Own Country get a prize - it won the "Unsung Film of the Year" award. I know lots of fans of GOC (of which I am certainly one) have been irritable about how CMBYN has sucked all of the awards oxygen out of the room so it's snazzy we made room for that, as well as B.P.M. which won Foreign Film. 2017 was such a banner year for exceptional queer cinema -- spreading the love is highly agreeable.

GALECA also awards television's best - give it up for a prizes for both Twin Peaks and American Gods! - and so if you'd like to see all of our quite wonderful winners you can see them after the jump...
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Sing Me a Song You're the Sparrow

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The first full-length trailer for Red Sparrow, Jennifer Lawrence's upcoming sexy espionage thriller with her Hunger Games director Francis Lawrence, premiered during the Globes last night - we had already seen a teaser back in September that alerted us to the whole "Joel Edgerton in itty bitty swim-trunks" thing, of which we took note, but knowing the film also co-stars Matthias Schoenaerts we were annoyed he was nowhere to be seen. Now he's seen!

Matty's actually all over this new longer trailer, even getting his own name card, which brings us no shortness of pleasure and joy. Watch:

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Red Sparrow is based on an entire series of books by Jason Matthews - I'm guessing if this does well our J-Law might have herself her own little Lady Bond (Lady Bourne?) series of sorts. Is Charlotte Rampling her M? Anyway it's out on March 2nd - hit the jump for a couple more gratuitous gifs of various menfolk in the trailer if you care...

A Bigger Burial

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On another (less interesting) movie site they would share this news with a picture of Gorgeous Movie Star Jennifer Lawrence, but we are blessedly not some other (lesser) movie site, we are MNPP, and so there is a picture of Italian Director Luca Guadagnino holding a bowl of soup. YOU ARE WELCOME. 

Luca is teaming up with JLaw to make a movie called Burial Rites, which is an adaptation of a 2013 book by Hannah Kent of the same title - anyone read it? Here what the book is about:

"A brilliant literary debut, inspired by a true story: the final days of a young woman accused of murder in Iceland in 1829. Set against Iceland's stark landscape, Hannah Kent brings to vivid life the story of Agnes, who, charged with the brutal murder of her former master, is sent to an isolated farm to await execution. Horrified at the prospect of housing a convicted murderer, the family at first avoids Agnes. Only Tóti, a priest Agnes has mysteriously chosen to be her spiritual guardian, seeks to understand her. But as Agnes's death looms, the farmer's wife and their daughters learn there is another side to the sensational story they've heard. Riveting and rich with lyricism, BURIAL RITES evokes a dramatic existence in a distant time and place, and asks the question: How can one woman hope to endure when her life depends upon the stories told by others?"

One's first reaction is that sure sounds different from what Luca's done before - a period piece set in 19th century Iceland about execution - but that last bit, about the book really evoking a sense of time and place and especially lyricism, well then it starts to sound a lot like Luca. As for Lawrence I think she's swell and I love how she keeps pushing herself - you can't look at something like mother! and come away not seeing an actress taking risks.

Anyway Luca's got his remake of Suspiria somewhat finished at this point from what I hear, it'll presumably be out in 2018, and then he's all set to make Rio with Jake Gyllenhaal and Michelle Williams (Brokeback in the house) and Benedict Cumberbatch - I haven't heard anything about when that's filming but I suppose Burial Rites will come after that.
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Set Aside Some Time For Mother This Weekend

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Well it's time for the weekend, meaning it's time for new movies, and this weekend's got a fine pair. This weekend's big offerings says me are Darren Aronofsky's mother!, which will be the big conversation piece even if it doesn't make a ton of money (which it probably won't, which is probably fine because this isn't a movie most people are going to want to grapple with) and which I reviewed right here yesterday. Watching the movie I flip-flopped from second to second whether it's Too Much Too Much or Just The Right Amount Of Too Much, but I have also spent the past two days not wanting to think about anything else and seriously contemplating going to see it a second time, so it's a sticker... and then some.

The other movie out this weekend is Mike White's movie Brad's Status, which stars Ben Stiller as a dude having a crisis of self when confronted with some old friends' successes - I'm seeing that tonight I think, so stay tuned for my thoughts on it next week. If you see anything of interest tell me in the comments, of if you want to scream about mother! do that in the comments. Next week screenings for NYFF start so things might get a bit quiet, but I'll be here Monday, and until then have a nice weekend, everybody.

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