Thursday, March 23, 2017

I'll Take One Happy End, Please

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If they were to ever make a movie about Michael Haneke it just struck me that Matthieu Kassovitz - the director and actor who is acting in Haneke's next film Happy End - could probably play him. Haneke is all gray beard and moppet hair anyway; he'd be easy to fake once you piled all that stuff on over a black turtleneck. Voila Insta-Haneke!

Aanyway here on the occasion of Haneke's 75th birthday - Happy birthday, dude! - I figured I'd check and see if we had any idea how long we were going to be waiting for Happy End, and IMDb actually has a couple of Euro release dates now -- it's coming out in Germany and France in mid-October. So I imagine we'll be getting it in awards season here too? I daren't dream it'll play NYFF... daren't I? October is perfect timing. I dare, I dare to dream!!!



Five Frames From ?

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What movie is this?
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Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... rejoining Aaron's desert butt cult.

Oh my Christ, you guys -- there has been a behind-the-scenes video of Aaron Taylor-Johnson's infamous June 2015 butt-baring photo-shoot for Flaunt on the internet since September of that same year, and I am just now seeing it. How... why... how???

I don't understand! Honestly it's better if I don't even try to understand - it's beyond comprehension. We should just pretend it's September of 2015 (Hotel Transylvania 2, which apparently happened, was making big box office!) and I am sharing this in a timely fashion. I'm so excited that Aaron is going to play Quicksilver in the next Avengers movie, you guys! I can't wait for his standalone film. Until then hit the jump for loads of gifs and the video...

Pic of the Day

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A post shared by Nina Persson (@theninapersson) on
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Oh my god it's all the Cardigans in one place.
From their Facebook page:

"Very very honoured to be selected into the Swedish Music Hall of Fame. And first time the five of us meet in ten years, which is fucking strange in itself. Hugs from the band."

Good god I wish they'd make new music.
Or at least tour. Just one show in my living-room, even!
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Frances Is My Second Favorite F Word

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If you sometimes find yourself whispering 
to yourself as you walk down the street...

... and the thought of a gift of vulgarity along those same lines being given to an actress as estimable as Frances fuckin' McDormand is too good to seem true, then have I got a goddamned trailer for you.
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We have previously expressed our enthusiasm about Three Billboards Outside Ebbing Missouri, but this trailer's showing that our greatest poet of cursing Martin McDonagh is in top form indeed. No exact date for this yet, just sometime this year, but if it's not out tomorrow it's too fuckin' far away.


Thursday's Ways Not To Die

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Yesterday I listed four terrific movies I watched this past weekend that TCM host Robert Osborne had recommended, and among them was The Big Clock, a 1948 thriller starring Ray Milland as an investigative reporter trying to prove his own innocence of the crime he's concurrently being forced to investigate by his boss, played by Charles "Chuck" Laughton. 

The movie's fab and I recommend you all watch it as soon as you get the chance - it is available to rent on Amazon for a couple bucks! Anyway I am a little reluctant to spoil its finale if you haven't seen it, which this post will do, so I am going to take the rest of this post after the jump. Come along if you have already seen the film or if you just don't care about spoilers...

Look Deep Into His Eyes, Jake

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I said deep, dammit.
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Arsenic and Black Lace

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I saw the poster for My Cousin Rachel first, and I was immediately struck by how goddamned pretty Rachel Weisz looked on it. But that's a given. She is Rachel Weisz. She is goddamned pretty. And also she gets her cheekbones massaged by Daniel Craig every single night before bed, so she wins. 

Anyway I knew nothing about this movie before looking at the poster, and as pretty as I thought Weisz looked the poster just made me think it was another costume drama where she'd cry beautifully in beautiful clothes a la The Light Between Oceans or The Deep Blue Sea. Mind you she's great at doing that and both of those are fine films, but that's not enough to make my heart pitter patter. Especially with a wet-noodle co-star like Sam Claflin.

Well I should've looked closer at the damn poster because the first clue that this was something different was right there. "Based on the Novel by Daphne du Maurier." I've never read this book - heck I'd never heard of the book, since the title triggered no response on its own. But the woman whose gothic tales inspired not one but two Alfred Hitchcock pictures...

... as the trailer rightly points out, well that'll get my blood pumping a bit faster. Anyway I didn't notice any of that on the poster, so it wasn't until I read The Film Experience's "Yes No Maybe So" on the trailer yesterday that I realized, "Hey you. Watch this damn trailer already." And then it still took me until last night, at which point...
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... I realized the real , profound error of my ways. 
Even Sam "Wet Noodle" Claflin
is exciting me in this trailer!

Then again the trailer works overtime in ogling his big butt in those old-timey trousers, so they earned my admiration with effort. But (butt) seriously this is so entirely in my wheelhouse - spinning candelabras and storm slammed windows and poisonous broads in lace and cliffs crumbling under horses and getting humped on by a hot guy in a field while remaining inscrutable in the face...

... this could be my life story.
Here's the trailer:
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Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:


Mildred: Wally, you should be kept on a leash!
Now why can't you be friendly?
Wally: But I am being friendly!
Mildred: No, I mean it.
Friendship's much more lasting than love.
Wally: Yeah, but it isn't as entertaining.

The astonishment of Joan Crawford entered this Earthly realm on this day in the year 1906, and one hundred and eleven years later we're still under her eyebrows spell. What are we thinking of Jessica Lange's performance on Feud?

I think she's terrific - it's never an imitation so much as it is getting at a general spirit of Joan-ness, but she does that and then some. During this past week's episode I had to go grab my copy of Joan's book My Way of Life off the shelf and flip through it, so strong had her vibes permeated the house. It was like a seance... or, more accurately, an exorcism. 

I have a question for you wonderful people out there who know movies, though: I know Joan's late work fairly well, from the 40s onward, but I'd love to see more of her early work - she goes back to the Silents! (In the year 1926 she acted in a film titled The Boob and a film titled Tramp Tramp Tramp, which is probably the best double-feature I have ever heard of.)

So what's Cannot Miss from her early years? 
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The New Alien Covenant Poster

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... is fucking gorgeous. Have you ever seen Rodin's sculpture called The Gates of Hell? They have one in Philly and I've seen that one (there are several copies around the world, natch) and that's totally what I'm feeling from this. It's a good pick!

Good Morning, World

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And Good Morning, Sebastian. 
(via)
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Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Zac Efron's All American Speedo Moment

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These pictures flash by super-fast
in the latest trailer for Baywatch
but the internet is forever, Zac. Forever.


Quote of the Day

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“Everybody loves to laugh. Larry David is great. 
Albert Brooks. Mel Brooks. I like girls that cry.”

-- That is David Lynch's answer when asked 
what makes him laugh, via GQ.
60 days until new Twin Peaks, everybody!
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Daniel Lapaine's Speedo Red Alert

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I always have a copy of Muriel's Wedding on hand in case of emergency and it came in handy just now - I was able to immediately check the footage and find out that yes that picture is actually a publicity still I have never seen before, and not just a shot taken from the movie. At no point in the finished film do we see that angle of Daniel Lapaine in his speedo, and if there's anything the world needs in it it is more angles of Daniel Lapaine in Muriel's Wedding in his speedo. (You can see our previous coverage of Daniel Lapaine in Muriel's Wedding in his speedo right here.) 

Anyway this grand and important image comes to us as the heavens themselves opened up and rained it down from the online video service FilmStruck's blog Streamline (thanks Mac), where they are celebrating the happy news that they are now streaming Muriel's Wedding for all of us to enjoy. Their piece on the film brought back many joyful memories I have of people I have recommended the film to totally being blindsided by its candy-coated pitch-black comedy - nobody quite expects the film to be such a nasty head-fuck going into it. Which is one of the (many many many many) reasons it's one of our very favorite movies. Now could somebody give Toni Collette something this good to work with again, dammit?


4 Off My Head - Ranking Robert Osborne's Faves

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When our movie-watching buddy Robert Osborne died a couple of weeks ago a Daily Beast article from 2012 started making the rounds - titled "Robert Osborne's Secret Favorite Movies" it lists eleven lesser-appreciated films that the TCM host loved and recommended. Of the 11 there were only 3 that I had previously seen (Dodsworth, Indiscreet, and Remember the Night) and all three are indeed fabulous, so I figured I'd make a go of seeing as many of these new-to-me titles as I could right quick. It didn't hurt that several of them were billed as thrillers. And so while lounging around gratuitously this past weekend I watched four of the movies in one long go of it. And now I shall rank them, from Least Good (although not bad, by any means) to Most Good, as I see them, because why not!

4. The Narrow Margin (1952) -- Nicely shot Film Noir from early in the career of director Richard Fleischer (he made everything from 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea to Red Sonja) starring Charles McGraw (he played the fisherman in the diner in The Birds) as a policeman who's forced to transport a mobster's about-to-sing moll across country via a train where Every Passenger Has Secrets. The last 15 minutes worth of surprises make it worthwhile but the moll herself is a real pain in the ass you're actively rooting against safe passage for. I suppose that's part and parcel for the moral murkiness of the Noirs but you don't love to hate her, you just kinda hate her.

3. The Big Clock (1948) -- Ask me again in five minutes and I might have totally rearranged the placement of these other three films, because I enjoyed all three of them immensely. I am planning on having more to say on The Big Clock tomorrow though for our "Thursday's Ways Not To Die" series, because it's got a death scene in it that I rewound and watched three times in a row. It's terrific. It stars Ray Milland as a crime magazine reporter tasked with working out a crime that he's personally just been framed for. He's trying to throw his fellow sniffing reporters off his own scent as the noose tightens; it's a great set-up, and the scenery (mid-century office building) is grand, and he's surrounded by a stellar supporting cast including Maureen O'Hara and my beloved husband-wife duo of Charles Laughton & Elsa Lanchester (the latter typically hysterical).

2. The Mating Season (1951) -- Every time I watch a Gene Tierney movie I kind of can't even process how extraterrestrially gorgeous she is - that woman was not of this Earth. I don't know why she isn't remembered more - she honestly might be the most beautiful Classic Hollywood actress there was. The Mating Season isn't entirely hers though - she plays a rich lady rescued from falling off a cliff (seriously) by a poor gentleman (John Lund, who's a bit of a dud frankly); the rest of the movie is a charming farce in which his mother (an Oscar nominated Thelma Ritter, typically delightfully Thelma-Ritter-ian) pretends to be their maid, et cetera shenanigans. Easily the best part of the movie is Miriam Hopkins playing Tierney's rich bitch mother - a total gas.

1. My Name is Julia Ross (1945) -- This movie rules! How had I never heard of this gem? It stars an adorably irritable Nina Foch as a woman who applies for a secretary position only to be kidnapped, drugged, and forcibly cast as the crazy wife of a crazy man in a mansion beside the sea in service of a murder plot most foul. How I went this far in life without a deranged Dame May Whitty I'll never understand. Julia Ross is utterly ridiculous, and I was enthralled.

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So have you seen any of these?
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Today's Mood

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Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

The Babadook (2014)
Amelia: Well, I'm not scared.
Samuel: You will be when it eats your insides!

Facebook just alerted me to the fact that I first saw The Babadook three years ago today! (I know, it's a weird thing for Facebook to alert a person to, but at least it's not throwing pictures of my dead relatives at me asking me to celebrate how long we've been Facebook friends for, this time.) Here is the picture I took of director Jennifer Kent at the early US screening, which was part of FSLC's amazing annual "New Directors" series. (Which not coincidentally is going on right now!)
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A post shared by Jason Adams (@jasonaadams) on
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Actually coincidentally though just last week we finally got news on Kent's next film Nightingale, which you can read about right here.  To just say we're looking forward to this movie underestimates the possibility of the word "forward." If when you hear "forward" you picture those star streaks you get jumping into hyper-space in Star Wars, only then are you on the right track...


Five Frames From ?

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What movie is this?
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Good Morning, Tony Goldwyn Again

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A kind commenter on yesterday's Naked Tony Goldwyn post told us to check out "a Showtime movie he did in 1993" which led me to Love Matters, which I think it the movie of which they spoke (he actually did several sketchy TV movies that year) - the whole thing's uploaded onto YouTube so I was able to grab some stuff but the quality's crap; where are the Criterion collection remasters of shitty 90s made-for-TV skin-flicks? Get your priorities straight, dudes.

There is better nudity in the movie than this scene (and it's below, natch) but I had to start with the scene of Tony naked beside shelves, of course. Of course. Seriously though Tony is playing a total man-whore in this - it appears to be nothing but an excuse for him to walk around naked for 90 minutes while schtupping 90s luminaries like Gina Gershon and Annette O'Toole while Griffin Dunne watches. I don't know. Hit the jump for the whole Tony and nothing but the whole Tony, so help us...