Friday, April 29, 2022
Have a Very Dornan Weekend
It's a Good Feel-Bad Weekend at the Movies!
There are two movies out in theaters today that I want to real quick recommend you seek out if possible, while also side-stepping writing proper reviews of them because in both instances I saw these movies months upon months ago, didn't write about them at the time, and then forgot to revisit them here in time for their theatrical releases. I suck, et cetera. Anyway I'm doing my least due diligence right now, and that's something! The first movie is Gaspar Noé's devastating and harsh small-scale flick Vortex, which stars the director Dario Argento and the actress Françoise Lebrun as an old married couple dealing with dementia while cooped up in a jam-packed-with-memories (and books!) Parisian apartment. And honestly this apartment, as claustrophobic as it might seem to most, looks like a dream to me. I aspire to their hoarder lifestyle. Anyway both actors are terrific and the film is deeply distressing, but in low-key and naturalistic ways that Noé's not really known for -- yes he uses a two-camera split-screen technique for the entire movie, but it's not a film that actively assaults you; it more just slowly leads you down a path to no return and it's so beautiful and so awful all at once. So yeah a real fun time! Highly recommended! Here's the trailer:
The second film I not reviewing but I am recommending is the Finnish nightmare fuel Hatching, a miniature fable equipped with talons that I saw during Sundance and very nearly wrote about but eventually didn't get to, under the massive crush of other stuff. Film festivals are tough in this way! But Hatching has been sneaking around the back of my brain ever since -- for one it's got some fantastic monster practical-effects that made my Inner 80s Child very very very happy. For another it tells its simple story wonderfully simple, with great economy, so it sticks in your brain in ways movies that try too hard don't. It feels like something your incredibly mean-spirited grandmother might have told you before bed one night when you were small and too impressionable. See it when you can see it!
Which is Hotter?
Well yes I should have done this with my earlier post this morning of 365 Days star Michele Morrone on his lonesome, but... well I didn't. But I also don't think any of you will complain about the double-dipping. Above Michele is seen with Simone Susinna, his co-star in Netflix's just-released sequel to their soft-core smash, this one called 365 Days: This Day which... ugh what a terrible title. But by all accounts the film is terrible as well, so it's fitting. Not terrible though are these two men, who are just grotesquely handsome. It's honestly disgusting how handsome they are. I hate them! And yet...
... I have other far more complicated feelings and thoughts as well. Okay, that's a lie -- these thoughts are not complicated. But they are unruly! Anyway I'm never going to watch these movies, but that doesn't mean we can't ogle the boys a bit while also making it a fun competition -- perhaps they'll hear about this and they can wrestle for us? Not to make any difference in the poll, of course. Just... to wrestle, for us. I just want them to wrestle, dammit!
5 Off My Head: The Pfeiffer Lady
The one and the only Michelle Pfeiffer, who is turning 64 today, can be seen at the moment on Showtime's The First Lady series, giving in my consideration the best performance on the show as Betty Ford -- I'll admit up front that I went into the show being pretty unfamiliar with Betty Ford, besides the the Cliff's Notes stuff with regards to alcoholism etc, so I don't have a person in my head that I have been comparing her to. But she's giving by far the most human and grounded performance...
My 5 Favorite Michelle Pfeiffer Performances
"It's the so-called 'normal' guys who always let you down.
Sickos never scare me. Least they're committed."
"Everything we own fell off a truck!"
"This is all just... setting."
"Don't make love to me.
Too many people have done that."
"Don't toot your horn, honey,
you're not that good."
Runners-up: French Exit, Where is Kyra,
The Fabulous Baker Boys, Stardust
Good Morning, World
I can't bring myself to watch those softcore Netflix movies called 365 Days or whatever (the second one just hit yesterday) but my god Michele Morrone really is something isn't he?
Thursday, April 28, 2022
Alexander Skarsgård Nine Times
Whoa ho ho how in the ho-world did I miss this Alexander Skarsgård photo-shoot last week until now? I guess I was a wee overwhelmed with The Northman itself hitting (here is my review) and all the other assorted Alexander accoutrement that came along for that ride -- Like did you see that you can pre-order the blu-ray already? You can! Right here! -- and so this GQ Hype one slipped through our cracks. Well let's reach down into our, uhh, cracks, and fix the situation. Hit the jump for the whole fine shoot...
Pics of the Day
The Luca Guadagnino edited issue of Fantastic Man magazine that I told you about on Monday is going to be the gift that keeps on giving, and giving, and giving -- as if half-nude photos of Josh O'Connor turning into a werewolf wasn't already enough today has revealed that Luca has recreated David Lynch's masterpiece Blue Velvet with actresses Chloe Sevigny, Julianne Moore, and Taylor Russell all standing in for classic Isabella Rossellini. (No word on who the naked hunk is, as far as I can tell -- do we think it's Josh again? I could buy it being Josh.) See more photos over here (thanks Brad!) and you can buy the magazine at this link.
I Said Shorts, Colin Said How Short
My terrifying powers of substantiation seem to have reached their pinnacle, as I have spoken things into existence not just once but twice today -- I talked about Juliette Binoche & Ralph Fiennes making a movie together and voila, they are making a movie together! And this morning I yelled at Colin Farrell for going two weeks without getting photographed in his iconic short-shorts, and here we go! (via) Okay these ones are a little longer than normal, so I don't know if they qualify as "short shorts" but I will take them in lieu of nothing. The colorful socks -- and those calves, as ever those gorgeous rock-hard calves, Colin clearly never skips Leg Day -- make up for that extra inch or two of length. (That's what he said.) So our thanks to Colin for listening to my extra-subliminal commands! I promise to only use my power for good (or what I deem "good" anyway). Hit the jump for the photos...
In June We Gay
On Monday I shared with you the trailer for Fire Island, director Andrew Ahn's upcoming comedy about a group of gay friends (including SNL's Bowen Yang and Margaret Cho) who storm the gay beach for some gay ol' summer adventure -- that is hitting Hulu on June 3rd, but the night before that here in NYC the film will be opening the Summer Edition of NewFest Pride, and you can buy tickets right this second for the screening and the after-party at this link. The full fest will run for four days with in-person AND virtual screenings -- I'll share the rest of the line-up when the time comes but for right now hit the jump for today's big press release...
Dino Dominion
Alongside tickets now being on sale (buy yours here) there's been a big drop of new Jurassic World: Dominion content today, with posters, photos, and a bigger gnarlier trailer than the first one we saw -- they've moved past the "holy shit we got the original trio of Sam Neill, Laura Dern, and Jeff Goldblum to reunite for this!" portion of the press push and now they've arrived at the "Hey we might murder one or more than one of your oldest pretend friends, what fun!" part, which yippee, that's definitely what our collective moods neeed these days. Needless stress, huzzah! Here is the trailer:
I haven't much liked any of the Jurassic World movies so my hopes aren't stratospheric for this, but we will see -- I would love love love to be proven wrong in my pessimism. I very much want this to be good, to capture even a tenth of the magic of the first film. As I've said a billion times the first Jurassic Park was my Star Wars -- I was the perfect age and I went and saw it in the theater fifteen goddamned times! I went every single day the week it was released in 1993. I was a junkie for it. The second and third films have their moments too -- indeed if you follow me on twitter...
Comfort watch time
— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) April 26, 2022
This scene still makes me cry
Also? John Williams greatest score #NowWatching pic.twitter.com/Tq5yh1k4MX
... then you know I am currently doing a re-watch of the movies, although I've only made it through the first two so far. And I'm actively dreading getting to the World movies already -- I haven't re-watched a single one of them after seeing them in the theater. They're so cynical, in my mind, so un-awed by what they're about -- Spielberg really made you feel the weight of Crichton's ideas, but the new ones just toss dinosaurs at us like junk-food. To paraphrase what Jeff Goldblum says to B.D. Wong in the first film -- the Jurassic World CG technicians were so preoccupied with whether they could create every single dinosaur and toss it on the screen in a melee of dino-action that they didn't stop to think if they should. Nothing matters in those movies, it's all popcorn, no weight. Anyway I hope Dominion makes itself matter! At least...
... seeing Laura Dern scream her freaking lungs out makes me care automatically, so there's that. This hits screens on June 13th -- hit the jump for a few more photos...
The Odyssey Stays Home
Weirdly I spent some time on Twitter yesterday talking about Juliette Binoche and Ralph Fiennes and suddenly today there is new news of Juliette Binoche and Ralph Fiennes making a new movie together -- hey if I have this sort of power let me put "Oscar Isaac and Kit Harington Erotic Thriller" energy into the world right now, while I'm at it. As for Ralph & Juliette they've previously co-starred in the 1992 version of Wuthering Heights (which is leaving Amazon Prime in a few days and which is what I was yammering about on Twitter) and then in 1996 again and more famously with the Oscar-winner The English Patient. Those two are off the top of my head -- have they done anything else together? It seems possible.
Did the 1992 version of WUTHERING HEIGHTS with Ralph Fiennes & Juliette Binoche for today's "Five Frames" post and realized -- I HAVE NEVER SEEN THIS WTF??? It's leaving Prime on the 2nd if you wanna join me and watch before then! Any fans? pic.twitter.com/LF8ohc4d5j
— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) April 27, 2022
Made For Billy
I contemplated saving this for tomorrow morning -- the above photo is perfect for one of my "Good Morning, World" posts after all -- but I decided since the show is debuting today I should just go with it. What show you ask? The second season of the show Made For Love, that's what show, which premiered on HBO Max today. Billy Magnussen shared some set photos on his Insta earlier and...
Good Morning, World
In lieu of Colin Farrell going for a jog in his short-shorts -- it's been two damn weeks, Colin, why are you denying us??? -- I have a behind-the-scenes video of his truly outrageous (and blessedly shirtless) make-up transformation into the Penguin for that dumb Batman movie that he was the only good thing about. And even though he was the best thing about it I still don't really understand why he got the role and not an older character actor who actually looked the part -- they exist, there are lots of them! Whatever, at least he was good, I shouldn't complain (more).
Wednesday, April 27, 2022
5 Off My Head: Siri Says 1937
Well I wasn't planning on doing one of my "Siri Says" posts today but I am the poisonous combination of being both dullard-minded and bored to boot this afternoon, and this is a good way to kill an hour plus -- wowza am I ever selling it today! You're welcome! Anyway today's pick ended up being "37" and so we'll be talking the Movies of 1937. Which well first things first it turns out this is the last year of the 1930s that I had left! So, as we do whenever we finish a decade, here are links to all of the 1930s...
Here are my favorite movies of 1930
Here are my favorite movies of 1931
Here are my favorite movies of 1932
Lots of fun to be had up in there, as the 1930s are obviously a killer decades for the movies -- indeed going though the movies of 1937 I have to admit that I was kind of shocked by how few 1937 movies I have seen? I'm pretty good with the 30s in general, but for some reason this year in particular is a big fat void nothingburger. I'll be curious to hear what movies y'all dig from it, because I got not a lot! The enthusiasm of this post, from start to finish, it's really something right? It's just that kind of day. On that note...
My 5 Favorite Movies of 1937
(dir. Leo McCarey)
-- released on October 21st 1937 --
(dir. William A. Wellman)
-- released on November 25th 1937 --
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(dir. King Vidor)
-- released on August 5th 1937 --
(dir. David Hand, etc.)
-- released on December 21st 1937 --
(dir. Leo McCarey)
-- released on April 30th 1937 --
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Never seen: Easy Living (dir. Mitchell Leisen), Topper (dir. Norman Z. McLeod), Lost Horizon (dir. Frank Capra), Captain Courageous (dir. Victor Fleming), The Life of Emile Zola (dir. William Dieterle), Marked Woman (dir. Lloyd Bacon)
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Barry Keoghan Two Times
Feeling impatient waiting for photos from this new magazine cover-shoot of our boy Barry to drop -- it's been like eighteen entire hours since these two covers were revealed, dammit! Don't the people at Arena Homme Plus understand that the world is on the verge of collapse and the only thing keeping some of us standing up are celebrity male photo-shoots??? I mean what should I look at the sky or something?
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