Friday, January 31, 2020

Episode For A New Pope

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I've lost track of what episodes have aired where and when of Paolo Sorrentino's The New Pope series, hence my lack of coverage here on the site (with a notable exception here and there), but please do watch it, I hope y'all are watching it. There's no show like it out there -- MNPP pal Sean T. Collins had a great piece up this week at this link with some of the reasons why that is. Anyway I'm not here specifically to talk about that show, but rather the other Jude Law Thing entering the universe this weekend -- Jude co-stars in a movie called The Rhythm Section that's now out...
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... which I have not seen, but hey it's a thing. Totally, a thing. As for other things there are two other movies out this weekend, ones I have seen and reviewed -- there is The Assistant with a masterclass in miniature acting from Julia Garner, read my review right here. And there is the horror flick Gretel & Hansel, which is basically a mess but does have some stuff to recommend at the same time, read my review right here. If you see anything worth seeing this weekend please do tell me about it in the comments! If the Satanists don't get me, anyway...
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Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

Häxan (1922)

Narrator: Centuries have passed and the Almighty of medieval times no longer sits in his tenth sphere. We no longer sit in church staring terrified at the frescoes of the devils. The witch no longer flies away on her broom over the rooftops. But isn't superstition still rampant among us? Is there an obvious difference between the sorceress and her customer then and now? We no longer burn our old and poor. But do they not often suffer bitterly? And the little woman, whom we call hysterical, alone and unhappy, isn't she still a riddle for us? Nowadays we detain the unhappy in a mental institution or - if she is wealthy - in a modern clinic. And then we will console ourselves with the notion that the mildly temperate shower of the clinic has replaced the barbaric methods of medieval times.

It's funny -- I've been a full-blown atheist now for a full two decades, but I'd still be lying if I didn't admit that the programming I had brainwashed and beaten into me in my youth attending the Church of God in the 1980s, aka the prime time of the big Satan Scare, didn't have a whisper of nervousness flitting about me as I prepare for my evening's plans tonight. For tonight, yes tonight, I will be attending a Black Mass y'all! 
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Oh man I hope it's just like the one seen there in 1970's Satanis: The Devil's Mass. Tonight the Anthology Film Archives here in New York is screening the above 1922 silent classic -- which just got the truly deluxe treatment on blu-ray thanks to the unholy wizards at Criterion -- as the opening feature of their series called "The Devil Probably: A Century of Satanic Panic." (Sidenote: they're screening my fave movie of ever Rosemary's Baby three times, including on Valentine's Day for you romantics out there.) And to celebrate the opening night they've invited the co-founder of the Satanic Temple, Mr. Lucien Greaves, to do a presentation and preside over a Black Mass ritual. 

(Am I nuts or is Greaves hot?) If any of you saw last year's phenomenal documentary Hail Satan? -- which I fiercely recommend,  it's on Hulu right now -- you're more than familiar with Greaves' brilliant and funny work trolling the hypocritical Religious Right in this country. He's very smart and very good at what he does, and I'm excited to hear him talk. And to see Häxan on a big screen! I've just got to stomp a little bit on the face of my inner child, who remembers all that churchy BS of his youth, to get there. Funny how deep that nonsense burrows itself. Anyway if there is a Devil and he comes to get me so be it -- my flesh is weak!


Matthew Goode Seven Times

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I was trying to find some further reason for posting these 2013 photos of Mr. Goode today, here in 2020, upon first seeing them just here this week (via) -- some 2020 news to share to go along with them anyway. I didn't especially succeed, except for the discovery that The King's Man, the Kingsman prequel starring Ralph Fiennes and Harris Dickinson and Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Matthew here, somehow isn't out until this September? What are they thinking? They released that movie's trailer last September! How does releasing a trailer a full year in advance make any sense? The movie is going to feel like a rerun (more like a rerun) seven months from now. Just like these 2013 pictures, I suppose, after the jump...

Happy Timmy Time

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There's been enough Timothée Chalamet news this week since I told you he's presenting at this year's Oscar ceremony on Tuesday to justify another post, I think -- it'd be even better if I had a new photo-shoot of him to go along with all of the words but we'll make due with what we can scrounge up. And revisiting Timmy's sparkle harness is always welcome. 
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Anyway on to the news! A logo for Denis Villenueve's Dune movie, which is out in December, was photographed at some movie studio event thing a couple of days ago and made the rounds on social media, although the studio kept erasing the image off the web so I never bothered posting it. But there's a doctored version of it, replicating it pretty close, at this link. Original Kwisatz Haderach Kyle Maclachlan had good things to say about Timmy, also at that link. Next up is word on Chalamet's other big 2020 project...

... it turns out that Wes Anderson's French Dispatch movie is actually titled The French Dispatch of the Liberty Evening Sun (although none of us are gonna be typing all of that) and will be out on July 24th. You can see the big names of the cast listed above -- it's quite the troupe. Oh and it got Rated R for ""Graphic Nudity" which is, you know, a surprise. I can't wait to see how perfectly framed and arranged all of the genitals are by Wes Anderson. Anyway it sounds like it's going to be a set of small stories smashed together:

"[The film] brings to life a collection of stories from the final issue of an American magazine published in a fictional 20th-century French city.”"

Obviously we don't know if that means it will be a series of unconnected vingettes a la the Coens' recent film The Ballad of Buster Scruggs, of if this "collection of stories" will be interwoven across one long-form narrative, or what. We don't know! It doesn't matter! Just put July 24 on your calendars, hike up your pants, and get yourself to the theater on that date, mkay?


Five Frames From ?

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What movie is this?
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Good Morning, World

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Okay I don't watch The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina for some reason -- it's just slipped by, like so much TV these days -- but my boyfriend does and I happened to catch the scene involving a certain Gavin Leatherwood -- I can't with that surname -- scrubbing himself in a tub and I thought to myself hey, I should post that.

Voila, done. I assume I have fans of the show 
reading here? So what have you got to say about it, huh?


Thursday, January 30, 2020

Aaron Taylor-Johnson Two Times

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Quote of the Day

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There's a fantastic new chat with our hero Paul Reubens up at THR today, which has him broaching the long-gestating and rumored subject of his so-called "Dark Pee-wee Movie" which has our favorite bow-tied wunderkind falling into a Valley of the Dolls-esque nightmare parable of drug addiction and Hollywood woe. I know, I know, it sounds weird, but I can also totally picture it -- and who didn't think a kiddie cartoon land of talking Pterodactyls and gay jokes sounded weird in the 80s? The 90s? Now??? It's best not to doubt Paul Reubens is my point. 

There's a lot of info in here -- apparently Reubens and Judd Apatow clashed some over the making of 2013's Pee-wee's Big Holiday, as Paul says his problem was mainly he wanted to make his dark movie and Apatow did not, and the lighter film was a compromise. I don't care, I love Holiday -- read my review here. I'll take my Pee-wee any which way I can get him. Here's a choice bit from this new chat as to where things stand now though:

"Reubens, now more than ever, still wants to make his Valley of the Dolls Pee-wee movie, even if nobody else does. According to several well-placed sources, he's been aggressively shopping the Pee-wee Herman Story script around town and has agreed to make the movie for $15 million, half the budget of Big Holiday. Apatow still isn't interested and Sarandos passed on the project for Netflix, saying it "doesn't check off all the boxes" of a Pee-wee movie, according to a source with knowledge of the exchange. Undeterred, Reubens approached the Safdie brothers, the sibling-director wunderkinds behind Uncut Gems, who are considering the project."

I might not have loved Uncut Gems like most did but I still have plenty of good will left for the Safdies thanks to Good Time, which I did love very very much, so I say let's mount a campaign and harass them into acquiescence. The thought of them making a Pee-wee movie lights my wig on fire! That's a positive thing. I think it's an incredible idea. And I'll scream just that at Paul Reubens from the audience when I see his live tour with Pee-wee's Big Adventure in a few weeks.
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Something Witchy This Way Witches

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Alongside American popular culture's regression into a seemingly single-minded fixation on superhero storytelling and the live-actioning of animated features there's been a third, darker strand of Hollywood's grasping for familiarly branded content -- the gritty glance-backs at a once grim (or perhaps Grimm) Fairy Tale Theater. Some of this overlaps nicely -- if we thought in quadrants we'd mention quadrants here - with Disney's reboots, as Alice and Snow White and Maleficent's pretty victim Aurora don battle gear to fight the waves of CG trolls and such; the fables we got whispered to sleep with now turned into big clanging things.

Gretel & Hansel, from director Osgood "Son of Anthony" Perkins, fits in alongside those in its way, but it's far smaller and stranger, more in league with 1997's Snow White: A Tale of Terror starring Sigourney Weaver, or Neil Jordan's The Company of Wolves with Angela Lansbury, or most especially A24's recent art-house output -- Perkins clearly loves him, as he well should, some Robert Eggers; you can see The Witch all over this thing. The Witch sought to up-end our sympathies on what draws a girl terrorized by patriarchal society into the sweet embrace of devilry, and there's a lot of that here as we watch Gretel (Sophia Lillis) slowly unearth an uneasy sisterhood (or perhaps a little more) from the gingerbread witch, here named Holda (and played to the fabulous hilt by Alice Krige, ever game).

The scenes between Gretel and Holda do thrum with a bizarre power -- somewhat sexual, it must be said, as the two women moisten their fingers and wave a divining rod back and forth, trembling open-mouthed with its every subtle tremor -- that sustains the film for a lot of its run time. Lillis and especially Krige make the most of the somewhat confused script, turning some nonsensical character beats into character quirks when needed. The movie doesn't seem to be sure of what it wants to say about the passing of an old school feminism towards a more modern sort, but then that conversation is a crowded one, littered with lots of bodies, male and female, on its path. Sometimes it's worthwhile just to throw all the guts on a table, fan 'em out, and see what looks tastiest. Eat til yer sick.

A lot of Gretel & Hansel looks and tastes very tasty indeed. Besides Krige's special-effect of a face the highest praise I can heap on this film is its stunning visual palette, with deep brown shadows melting into a gooey caramel crust -- it looks absolutely delicious. The design on all counts -- the costumes, with Krige's sharp-shouldered cloaks are a real stand-out, as well as the sets, with a modern-tinged A-frame standing absurdly as an elbow pressed into the forest's soft intestines. It clangs off-tune just right, which is to say just wrong.

And yet the film, for all the good bits, doesn't really ever cohere into a finished product -- too many of its interesting ideas remain half-baked in the oven, or otherwise burned black to soot where it should count. When Gretel and Holda aren't holding strange court as the flip sides of womanly considerations the film just kinda sits there, flat and pretty as a still picture, or twitching slightly at its corners, an elaborate moth pinned scientifically for some further study that never quite comes.


Thursday's Ways Not To Die

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"I’m not sure the British are really suited for giant monster movies. No offense to the Brits, but watching a bunch of folks stand around and keep the stiff upper lip while radioactive monsters from the deep attack London isn’t too much fun."

That quote is from a 2006 review of this movie that for some reason has made its way onto this movie's Wikipedia page -- maybe I should start editing Wiki pages to include my quotes on movies, if that's a thing? Anyway I'll admit the quote summed up a thought I had about the film while watching some of the scenes giffed above, where several of the British ladies charged with doing the "run in terror from the monster" thing hilariously couldn't seem to be bothered...

Entire generations of Japanese Extras did not lose their voices from screaming at an invisible Godzilla monster so that you could gently stroll forward while luxuriously cradling your handbag, Mrs. Danvers. You're not headed to Harrods for tea, lady! But the best of all these stiff upper lippers is in seen among that group of poor folks who find themselves being radioactivated up top...

She is definitely thinking about tea. 

I rib because I love. TCM just recently aired The Giant Behemoth on a double bill with the movie it shamelessly ripped off, 1953's The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms, which had its far superior effects done by Ray Harryhausen...

Harryhausen's beautiful beastie attacked ye old standby of New York City, while Behemoth tackles Londontown, so I guess that's a difference... anyway Behemoth's effects were done by Willis H. O'Brien, who will forever be loved and admired for doing the ape called King Kong's stop-motion. The Bememoth's... notsomuch. But I have room in my heart for all of God's creatures...

Hit the jump for links to all of the previous Ways Not To Die...

Suddenly... Taron?

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All of the reporting on this seems to be coming from unverified sources, but that's not keeping Twitter from reacting so what the hell, I'll bring it up -- there's are two rumors going around that 1) Taron Egerton is going to play Seymour in a new Little Shop of Horrors movie, and 2) Scarlett Johansson will be playing Audrey. Audrey #1 that is, the Ellen Greene role. Not the plant. Although I'd enjoy the plant more? 

I know I've come out as boldly indifferent to the concept of remakes -- that they don't erase the original versions and you can still love the previous version just fine even with the new property in the world -- but the thought of anyone playing Audrey except for Ellen Greene has always been been my kryptonite. I can't even imagine it, so inextricable do I find that role and that actress. When I saw Jake Gyllenhaal do the musical live a few years ago that was fine, because Greene was still there as Audrey -- some might've scoffed at their age difference but I didn't even notice. She remains Audrey. 

I am perfectly aware that that wouldn't work on film, though -- I was sitting in the balcony and could suspend my disbelief well enough from that distance, something a single close-up in a film would throw right out the window. But I just can't wrap my head around somebody else as Audrey. I'm not even anti-ScarJo -- I could see her mixing some sweetness into the city gal she played to great effect in Don Jon and getting the appropriate cocktail for the part. She doesn't have Greene's voice but man, if we held out for Greene's voice another 30 years would pass. (Which, you know, would be okay.)

As for Taron... well some people complained that Jake was too hot to play Seymour but I loved his take, and it'd be hypocritical to argue otherwise for Taron. He'll be the Sexy Nerd in a pair of glasses with bulging biceps obviously, but he can at least sing. I don't know? It's still too early for this for me. Thoughts?
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Five Frames From ?

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What movie is this?
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Good Morning, World

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If you can believe it Mr. Tom Selleck turned 75 years old yesterday -- I mean I suppose you might believe it since who's seen Tom Selleck lately? IMDb says he's on some show called Blue Bloods but I don't believe that, that's a made up thing. Tom Selleck hasn't been in anything since he made this here movie Mr. Baseball in 1992, and then he died. That's my story. Mr. Baseball killed Tom Selleck. RIP Tom Selleck. Hit the jump to appreciate some gifs the much beloved and bestached actor in his final role...

Wednesday, January 29, 2020

A Man For All Horses

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So many trailers today! Next up we've got the trailer for Calm With Horses, which stars the other person in Lady Macbeth, the one not named Florence Pugh, the one named Cosmo Jarvis. (See our previous gratuitous post on him here for some reasons why we care.) Cosmo, as I have mentioned previously, is looking mighty Tom Hardy Jr in this flick, which is about an ex-boxer with rage issues who keeps getting pulled into violent situations, especially thanks...

... to the ever bad influence of Barry Keoghan. Oh Barry! You're terrible. Anyway I thought Cosmo was very good in Lady Macbeth, even as that dastardly Pugh woman stole all of the accolades, and I'm glad he's lined something up since I haven't seen him around much. (I don't watch Peaky Blinders -- did him and Tom Hardy make out on Peaky Blinders? I'll watch it if that happened.)

Anyway I've posted about this film a few times before, including some photos and a clip, you can see all that back here. It's been floating around since premiering at fests last year. I haven't read any of the reviews because they kind of don't matter, not before I see it anyway -- I wanna have some Cosmo in my life. Here's the trailer:
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Don't know when we'll get this in the US 
but it's out in the UK on March 6th.