Friday, April 28, 2006

Mistress of the Dark

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"Nothing exceeds like excess."
- Elvira Hancock (Michelle Pfeiffer), Scarface

Nathaniel R over at Film Experience has dubbed today and tomorrow - well, every day if you're as Pfeiffer-inclined as he - not that there's anything wrong with that ;-) - a celebration of all things Pfieffer.

I happily comply. (as are many, many others)

When I think of Michelle Pfieffer, I think of an almost unholy beauty - inhuman, sharp... it hurts me sometimes to look at her. I remember Roger Ebert saying, I think in reference to her in Frankie & Johnny (so, yes, as a criticism of her there - Michelle? A waitress???), that both she and Geena Davis - whom he's referred to more than once as a Valkyrie - are too beautiful to be completely believed as actual, real human beings; that they exist on a totally different realm. Pfeiffer reminds me of that moment you first see Grace Kelly in Rear Window - the room is dark, Jimmy Stewart is asleep, and her face pops out of the blackness coming straight at the camera, lips parting, and every single damn time I see it I gasp for air. Looking at Michelle Pfeiffer is like that every time; with every single shift of light, from frame to frame, a new angle appears and I find my breath emptying out of my body. She makes me understand what it would mean to be a heterosexual man, in unsubtle terms.

But it's a beauty that is, like that of so many of the best film stars, imperfect - in fact, it's the imperfections that add up to something altogether better; more perfect, if you will. Her lips can be strange creatures, seemingly acting on their own, catching on themselves; her eyes... well, it's her eyes that do it, too far apart on her head, resting on those... cheekbones... they signal danger, of the playful sort, like when a lioness is batting around its wounded prey for fun.

Nate's right when he says that Michelle Pfeiffer in Scarface is still not quite Michelle Pfeiffer. She's too young, her face has yet to be carved into the sharp corners that will make her so striking just a few years later. But... she's well on her way. What surprised me, watching Scarface last night for the first time was how little Pfeiffer's in it - she gets maybe twenty minutes of screentime at most, and disappears for the final act - but what an impression she does make, and what a loss her presence is at the end.

When we first see Elvira, her back is to us as she glides slowly down the wall of her kingpin boyfriend's livingroom in a glass elevator that resembles nothing short of a Barbie case. And from there on out, we, like Tony Montana (Al Pacino), can look at nothing else when she's there.

Nate makes an apt case for the animalistic charms of Pfeiffer, and for her next prominant role in Ladyhawke as a bird-woman, and here she is also birdlike - when she and Tony dance together the night they meet he pointedly remarks that her last name - Hancock - sounds like a bird. But in contrast to the wild bird she is in Ladyhawke, Elvira is trapped in a gilded cage of her own making. Whether it be the drug addiction or Elvira's self-destructive insecurities, not until her final scene does she seem to realize the life she's herself in to is not the one she wants. I'd say she genuinely loves Tony, as he does her, and in his own twisted way he frees her from her cage, making it possible for her to leave. He tells her, in his own piggish way, that she should do something with herself; that lounging around doing coke and waiting for him to fuck her are no way to live one's life. In her final scene, when she tells him she's leaving him, she tells Tony, "Can't you see what we're becoming, Tony? We're losers. We're not winners, we're losers." She, luckily, finds the foresight to escape before the entire cage comes crumbling down around them all.

And even though Pfeiffer's role is smaller than I imagined it to be, I think my boyfriend's claim that every "coke-whore wife" role that followed, from Sharon Stone in Casino to Penelope Cruz in Blow, does owe Pfeiffer's Elvira an immense debt. Once Elvira is pulled from her spot as Tony's crown jewel, the epitome of what stood for his American Success Story, he could do nothing but fail, and his kingdom came toppling down.

And isn't that the case with all of us? Once we lose our Pfeiffer-fix, isn't just a matter of time before we're all face-diving into a mountain of cocaine and being shotgunned in the back? Thank God she's back on screen in a couple of months!

There are a slew - a mountain of coke's worth, one could say - of other people posting about Pfeiffer today, you can find all the links here.

Today's Mood

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Bub (Sherman Howard), from Day of the Dead

"URGH!"


In other words, I feel like death warmed over. My head is a complete fog. I just can't wait to sleep ALL weekend.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Radiohead Rumblin'

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I'm so nervous that I'm not going to get tickets to see Radiohead when (if???) they show their faces here this summer. The rumors of their show dates are already floating around, but they've yet to release anything specific except for the two Boston shows on June 4th and 5th, and the Bonnaroo festival. That link above says they're guessing the NYC shows (If they have them? IF???) will be June 7th and 8th at MSG. They HAVE to be that week, before I leave for Puerto Rico... I missed them their last tour and it was like skinning myself alive, not being there. Tickets are going to vanish SO quickly, though, I gotta be on that shit the second they're available.

They're still in the studio right now, it seems; these are all some recent pics from their blog.




















I really am dying with glee that it's a Radiohead-releases-a-new-album year, though. Too fucking far between, guys!


Hatchet On

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I'm getting more excited with every little bit I hear about the film Hatchet, that I'm seeing this Sunday at the Tribeca Film Festival. Here's an interview with the film's director, Adam Green, and he comes across as, well, a huge horror geek like myself.

"What I like best about slasher films is what I think most people like, which is the villain. The mythology behind how the villain became who they are, the fact that the villain is usually death itself and there’s no way to escape it is what’s so fun. When you have people like Michael Myers and Freddie and Jason it got to the point where the movie was more about seeing what they would do next rather then the other characters in it.

Once Scream came around it was cool because it kind of brought it back, but it kind of made it a WB whodunit type thing, and at the end of each one there was a mystery. It was like Scooby Doo, at the end they would pull off the mask, and I was let down – I wanted to see something horrific beneath that mask. Then they kind of beat that to death and now in the 2000s it’s all remakes and torture films. I’m hoping that people will respond to Hatchet and get what I’m trying to do and we can bring it back around to the way where horror was actually entertaining and fun. There’s a lot comedy in the movie, but there’s no comedy with the horror, if that makes sense. It’s not like Scary Movie where it’s spoofing anything, it’s just really fun likable characters who get put in the most awful situations."

Oh, and LOVE that poster.

Sweet Black Jesus, It's Here

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The trailer for the Strangers With Candy movie has arrived! I watched it with the sound off (stupid workplace rules!) and am foaming at the mouth already. It comes out June 28th.



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Today's Mood

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Muriel "Mariel Heslop-VanArckle" Heslop (Toni Collette),
from Muriel's Wedding

"When I lived in Porpoise Spit, I used to sit in my room for hours and listen to ABBA songs. But since I've met you and moved to Sydney, I haven't listened to one ABBA song. That's because my life is as good as
an ABBA song. It's as good as 'Dancing Queen'."

Vieques, Here I Come.... Again!

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Deep sigh of relief.

The boyfriend and I just worked out another trip to Vieques, Puerto Rico, for this summer! I am so excited, and relieved - this summer was looking to be vacation-free, but now that I have the specter of white sands looming ahead I feel much better about the next couple of months.

The boyfriend's got friends who have a place down there, so the trip ends up being relatively cheap, which does my too-thin wallet a favor.

We went to Vieques last summer, too, which I blogged about here and here and here and here and here. Such a beautiful, peaceful island. I can't wait! We leave mid-June, and are gone for about a week.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Will Is Legend

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From DH:
"Will Smith will star in the long gestating Warner Bros. sci-fi thriller "I Am Legend", and its expected to be his follow-up project once he wraps work on Sony's "Tonight, He Comes" superhero flick reports Ananova.

Based on the classic by Richard Matheson, and a post-apocalyptic New York. "I Am Legend" is about the last healthy man following the release of a virus that decimates the population. To survive, he must battle mutants that wreak havoc during the night.

Akiva Goldsman ("A Beautiful Mind", "The Da Vinci Code") is penning the adaptation which will be directed by Francis Lawrence ("Constantine"). Shooting is scheduled to begin in New York early next year."

I don't, in theory, have much against Will Smith. He's charming, he's cute-ish, he was The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air ("I got in one little fight and my Mom got scared / She said you're moving with your Auntie and your Uncle in Bel-Air"), and Six Degrees of Seperation is one of my favorite films (that's due to Stockard Channing, though, not so much him).

But I felt burned by I, Robot - as Alex Proyas' return to sci-fi after directing the truly awesome Dark City, what a let-down; I think Proyas probably felt burned, too, by a dumb script and Smith's star-meddling.

I've not seen Ali, but Smith did look and sound the part; so I can't judge if that was his last quality film... but everything else he's known for, in all his days as a "movie star", is tripe. (Though I will admit I've watched Independence Day more than I'd like to... but, but, Jeff Goldblum!)

Anyway, I loved Richard Matheson's book I Am Legend. It's both a terrifying and intelligent read. And yes, it already got turned into a (fun) schlockfest with Charlton Heston once. So the precedent exists for the story to be dumbed-down and Hollywood-ized... and I'm not really that attached to the psuedo-science in the book, they can jettison all... well, most of that... if they just make it scary. The book is leave-your-lights-on-all-night scary; I don't want some cheesy CG-enhanced crappy treatment of this book. I want a balls-out fright fest. This story has that, as of yet, unrealized filmic potential.

Hiring the director of Constantine troubles me, because while I liked Constantine more than I probably should have (but, but, Tilda Swinton as the Arch-Angel Gabriel... and Peter Stormare as Satan!) it was all about using crappy CG way too much. This is a story that screams for old-school special effects; I want Rick Baker or Tom effin' Savini doing the make-up and gore - truckloads of gore - for this; I don't want some show-offy shot where we zoom through a CG wound; I want to feel battered and bruised and bloodied by it.

So... I'm hesitantly optimistic... just that it's getting made, really. I'm hopeful they don't fuck it up. It's obviously too early to tell. Fingers crossed. It could be worse... Arnold Schwarzenegger was supposed to play the part a few years back. Yikes!

He's All Mine To Hug!

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Nathaniel over at Film Experience points out today that it's "Hug An Austrailian" Day, and was kind enough to leave Eric Bana all to me. Thanks, Nate! I'll not forget your sacrifice whilst lost among those taut Bana-biceps... oh who am I kidding - I'd trade in the memory of my mother's face in exchange for a hug from Eric Bana.


He really likes to put his arms up when posing for pictures, huh? I can't imagine why a photographer would ask him to pose like that. Whatever could be the reason... oh. Right. IT STOPS MY HEART DEAD EVERY TIME HE DOES.

Today's Mood

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If I were a movie character today, I would be :


Mike Waters (River Phoenix), from My Own Private Idaho

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

No More Harmony

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So I got tickets to 3 different movies at the Tribeca Film Festival starting this weekend, one of which is Hatchet, which their site describes thusly:

"Adam Green's modern interpretation of the iconic late '70s and early '80s horror slasher flicks pits a deformed, hatchet-wielding baddie against a group of young Mardi Gras revelers on a "Haunted Swamp Tour." Filled with boobs, beer, beads, and buckets of blood, Hatchet sports a sly sense of humor and appearances by icons of the genre like Robert Englund (Freddy Krueger), Kane Holder (Jason Voorhees), and Tony Todd (Candyman). But despite the many horror allusions, the film's main draw is its classic story…."

Anyway, I was looking forward to the film, having that pig-in-slop feeling whenever I get to see a new Slasher flick, but now I'm even more excited: Mercedes McNab, i.e. Harmony from Buffy and Angel, is in it! Yay!

The boyfriend and I were just talking about her the other night, wondering if she was getting any work. The boyfriend wants to meet Joss Whedon just so he can pitch a Buffy/Angel spinoff that would be an half-hour sitcom about Harmony working at an office... so he's going to be even more excited. She's comedy gold, though.

I discovered her presence in the film because of this new interview with McNab over at CHUD: She, sadly, says she has no expectations for any Buffy or Angel spin-off's to happen... but honestly, I wonder how in-the-loop she is.

That's me being bitter, though. Love ya, Harm!

Supes In Black

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Why, exactly, does Ma Kent seem to be pushing Kal-El's hand so... forcefully... down into that direction? Not that I could blame Eva Marie Saint for wanting to cop a feel of Mr. Routh's "Super-Package", but damn, wait 'til the cameras aren't rolling, corner the kid in his dressing room... do it like a pro, woman!

Or do I just have a filthy mind?

Damn, he does fill out that suit, though.

Right. Filthy mind. Check.

(from Blue Tights)

Rumor of the Day

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A live-action all-non-Asian version of the manga Sailor Moon, starring Lindsay Lohan and Jennifer Garner, and written/directed by Joss Whedon?

Er. Okay.

From JoBlo: "A Japanese Magazine titled Animage, in their current issue, announced that Fox has acquired the rights to the popular anime series SAILOR MOON and is looking to Joss Whedon to presumably write and direct a live action film. Further, they're hoping Miss Can't Keep Her Genitals Inside Her Clothes herself Lindsay Lohan will star alongside Jennifer Garner (as the main villain) in an all non-Asian cast."

Lindsay just has to play the purple-haired one on the right who's cupping the other one (dare I say, Kate Moss?)'s tit. It's just... so her, ya know?

Today's Mood

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If I were a movie character today, I would be :


The Shobijin, from Mothra

"Mothra O Mothra
If we were to call for help
Over time
Over sea
Like a wave you'd come
Our guardian angel!"

Monday, April 24, 2006

Patience : The Final Frontier

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Blogger appears to have a serious hangover - my guess is it's cracked out from snorting Oxycontin all weekend - so I dunno if I will be very prolific today since every time I try to create a post it slips into some other dimension.

Today's Mood

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If I were a movie character today, I would be :


"We all float down here"
- Pennywise, from It
.

Friday, April 21, 2006

Me, Not Here, Day Three

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Here's what I did at The Film Experience today...


Other People's Lists.

Celebrate Earth Day The Right Way.


Have a happy weekend, people! I am off.

Ryan Phillippe & A Sponge

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It's Friday, time to be gratuitious... as if I've ever needed it to be a specific day for me to be gratutious...


(lots more - along with video!!! - at JJ)

These are from a film called Five Fingers that'll be playing at the Tribeca Film Festival here in NYC next week. That's Gina Torres, of Firefly, Alias, and Cleopatra 2525 fame, getting to scrub Mr. Witherspoon to a shine.

Oh, the shame... how I loved Cleopatra 2525. I was in college, and would come home from some drunken exploit at 2am, and there c-2525 would be, in all its hacky glory.

I love you, Gina Torres!

Such A Good Brother!

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Aww, he's showing Maggie how to ride his skateboard!



Apparently he's been skating all over town. In MY neighborhood.

This is a cruel world... A FARCE!!!

Today's Mood

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If I were a movie character today, I would be :


Linda Partridge (Julianne Moore), from Magnolia
...

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Me, Not Here, Day 2

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I need to remember to do this before I am gathering my things up to leave work for the night, but here's a link to my "work" over at Film Experience today... only one real post of substance, and one easy one:

She Has Her Fathers Eyes...

Guess the still.

Nighty night, all!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Jake. Spandex?

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Spandex is nobody's friend. But it is Jake, so... I can deal.




















More pics over at IHJM. Also, over at JJ (more pics there too), we learn that Jake and his "buddy" Austin are once again sharing clothing... or at least, both of them have the same jacket. Benefit of the doubt, people!


Another Ode To Acker

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Somebody that works on Alias just loves Amy Acker. Not that I could argue - she is the bee's knees. But on last night's new episode, could Acker have been framed and lit more beautifully? And my lil' Winifred, all growed up, shooting down a helicopter with a rocket launcher, then walking away in slow-mo being backlit by the falling debris? Priceless.

Vaughn's alive! What a non-surprise!

Am I the only person even bothering to see this show through to the end?

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Me, Not Here

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As I said yesterday, I'm doing some guest-blogging over at Film Experience this week (through Monday). I figure I'll link to my posts over there each day, for my own personal s&g :

I connect the dots between the 80s' British horror film Paperhouse and the Joey Lawrence sitcom Blossom. Whoa.

Me, on the film Eyes Without A Face.

There are also fine posts by all the other guest-bloggers... which, if I weren't walking out the door of my office in about thirty seconds, I'd link to them too... but just go to Film Experience, read it all the time, bookmark it, love it like it's the spawn of Xenu!
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Death Cab Vs. Franz Ferdinand

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I don't think I've mentioned I saw the Death Cab For Cutie & Franz Ferdinand show this past Friday night here in NYC at the Hammerstein Ballroom. Well... I did. And had a blast, I'm big fans of both bands and they both put on fantastic shows. I also, thanks to a good friend with "connections", got to watch the show from the uppermost private balcony, and man, I can't imagine a better place to watch a show from. I been spoiled!

Anyway, it was a boozy free-for-all up there, and I couldn't honestly tell you half of what FF played, because by that time, I was trashed.

But I bring all this up because I read my first review of the show just now, over at EW, and the reviewer takes a massive dump on DCFC, which... makes me defensive. This is the second time I've seen them play, and I thought they were even better this time... but then, again, I was very, very drunk. My opinion... slightly discredited.

But Boo! Boo on you, EW critic "Raymond Fiore"! You're dumb... and stuff.

Sharks Gone Wild

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Wowza.


These are some screen-grabs from this test footage - watch it, it's amazing stuff. JoBlo.com describes the footage thusly:

"Recently producer and CHUD head honcho Nick Nunziata posted some concept art from his upcoming film MEG on their site. Jan De Bont has signed on to direct the film with Guillermo Del Toro producing with Nunz and all are hard at work at shaping the look of the film. That art aside, we got sent some video today from the site of a VFX company that shows some footage from a project they call "Megaladon" the name of a prehistoric shark that MEG is short for. It's all CGI work and takes a few seconds to start to make sense but boy when it does, it's got a pretty schnazzy payoff. Now it's not 100% confirmed that this is from New Line's MEG movie but even if it isn't, it's a good guess at what these guys might be looking at for their film."

Today's Mood

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If I were a movie character today, I would be :


Joan Cusack, Holly Hunter, and Albert Brooks' characters
from Broadcast News mixed in a blender.

Today In Shirtless Celebs...

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Josh Duhamel. Jude Law. My brief gift to you.

(more at JJ)

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Come With Me...

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Starting tomorrow, and going on through Monday, I've been handed the reins - along with several others - to guest-blog for the wonderful Nathaniel R. over at his wonderful site, Film Experience, while he's away.

The world trembles.

Or, at least, I do. Seriously.

I'll still, presumably, have more than enough junk left in my trunk to post right here in the Pants over that course of time... seeing as how my usual run of "Dagnabit! I'm hungry!" and "Look! Jake's taking out his trash!" posts will have no place over there... they'll be left on their rightful throne... right here.

But whatever small word-vomits of wisdom I may have that are film-related - and lord knows I always have plenty - those you can look for over there, in far prettier surroundings.

Do. Look there. Now and forever.

Wentworth Opens Wide

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Hmm. Maybe I should start watching Prison Break...

(more pics at JJ)