Friday, June 20, 2008

Thursday's Friday's Ways Not To Die

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Teeth (2007)

Four out of four men agree:
HELL NO.

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Previous Ways Not To Die: Run Down By M. Night Shyamalan -- Everything Up To And Including The Kitchen Toaster -- Sacrificed To Kali -- Via The Gargantuan Venom Of The Black Mamba Snake -- Turned Into An Evil Robot -- The Out-Of-Nowhere Careening Vehicle Splat -- "Oh My God... It's Dip!!!" -- Critter Balled -- Stuff'd -- A Hot-Air Balloon Ride... Straight To Hell!!! -- Puppy Betrayal -- High-Heeled By A Girlfriend Impersonator -- Flip-Top Beheaded -- Because I'm Too Goddamned Beautiful To Live -- By Choosing... Poorly... -- Fried Alive Due To Baby Ingenuity -- A Good Old-Fashioned Tentacle Smothering -- Eepa! Eepa! -- Gremlins Ate My Stairlift -- An Icicle Thru The Eye -- Face Carved Off By Ghost Doctor After Lesbian Tryst With Zombie Women -- Electrocuted By Fallen Power-Lines -- A Mouthful Of Flare -- Taken By The TV Lady -- Bitten By A Zombie -- Eaten By Your Mattress -- Stuffed To Splitting -- Face Stuck In Liquid Nitrogen -- Crushed By Crumbling Church Debris -- Bitten By The Jaws Of Life -- A Machete To The Crotch -- Showering With A Chain-Saw -- In A Room Filled With Razor Wire -- Pod People'd With Your Dog -- Force-Fed Art -- Skinned By A Witch -- Beaten With An Oar -- Curbed -- Cape Malfunction -- In The Corner -- Cooked In A Tanning Bed -- Diced -- Punched Through The Head -- Bugs Sucking On Your Head
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6 comments:

Joe Reid said...

IT'S TRUE! VAGINA DENTATA!

Daniel said...

I have always assumed that all women have teeth down there

Kristine said...

Good choice! I just watched this movie on Sunday so it's still firmly placed in my mind.

JA said...

I know a lot of people haven't seen this movie yet, so I wanted to walk a line between not showing too much and giving away the good stuff while still capturing the funny/horrifying nature of the scenes. See this movie, world! It's been kinda stuck in my brain since I saw it months ago.

Herbaliscous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
AB and the Bear Suits said...

We just saw this last week. It was easily the most fun we've had watching a horror movie in a while.