Tuesday, August 28, 2018

Do Dump or Marry: Fincher's Dirty Diggers

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That picture of David Fincher (who is turning 56 today) slamming his eyes shut just seems right somehow, doesn't it? There are a lot of things that Fincher has shown me that I wish I could un-see. Wizened half-corpses writhing under air-fresheners... Sigourney Weaver falling into a pit of molten steel... Sean Penn. But for all the grody he's given us plenty of gorgeousness to boot, and that's what keeps us tethered tight. Recall his early-on music-video career... 

... and all those pretty people being pretty that he gave us. There's an awful lot to look at! But even among the muck of his filthy-minded and mean-spirited (I use those adjectives with definite affection) later works there's usually an abundance of eye candy to sweeten that savory - I mean just think of the detectives he's granted us as our avatars into these worlds; as the tips of the spears piercing these darkest dark corners...

Think ye upon Jonathan Groff in Mindhunter, Brad Pitt in Seven, and Jake Gyllenhaal in Zodiac, and do whatever the opposite of despair is. Or even better, Do Dump or Marry that instead. In the comments below tell me which of these characters - Holden Ford (Groff), Detective Mills (Pitt) and the cartoonist turned amateur sleuth Robert Graysmith (Gyllenhaal) - you'd have a one-night fling with, which you'd take eternally in sickness and health, and which you'd stab mercilessly beside an autumnal lake. Have at it...


11 comments:

J.D. Fitzgerald13 said...

I know this is cheating, but all do all of them.

Matty said...

Do Jake, Marry Groff, Dump Brad

paul said...

do jake. marry jake. dump the other two.

Anonymous said...

Do Groff, marry Brad and dump horse-face Jake

Anonymous said...

Do Groff, dump Pitt, marry Jake!

Anonymous said...

Do Brad. Dump Groff. Marry Jake.

Jonathan said...

Dump Brad. Do Groff and marry Jake.

Shawn McGuire said...

Groff Groff Groff

DP said...

Groff x 3!

JB said...

Do Brad, then marry Brad. (Peak brad)

Gabriel Braga said...

Do Brad (just in honor of my childhood fantasies), marry Jake (come on, who else?), dump Groff (only one left)