Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Dornan Because You Demand It

I don't know if I ever told you guys that I tried to watch Fifty Shades of Grey one night a long time back and I couldn't finish it - I only made it about halfway through; that fucking movie is over 125 minutes long, and practically every one of them is an excruciating test of the edges of human agony, and not the sexy bondage sort of "limit pushing" that they might be thinking I mean. It's boring and ugly and too dumb to even be fun.

Anyway the trailer for the new one's here and there's approximately five seconds of Jamie Dornan flesh in it - because everybody's going to see these movies for elaborate plots and Eyes Wide Shut party masks, I guess. I did my duty and fast-forwarded through it and here, you can see here, all the Dornan you need. Don't bother otherwise, people! Don't do it! Save yourselves!

The Fall is a very good show with Gillian Anderson and Jamie Dornan in his underwear, while A Bigger Splash is a very good movie with a very good performance from Dakota Johnson plus the dicks of Matthias Schoenaerts and Ralph Fiennes! You should watch those.

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