Tuesday, March 08, 2016

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... hosing down Zac Efron.

I'm sure you've all been kept awake the past few nights wondering why I hadn't been posting hourly updates with all the pictures of Zac Efron romping around greased up like a Thanksgiving turkey on the set of Baywatch this week -- truth be told 1) I'm a little bit Efron'd out, and 2) I don't know what happened between his time on the set of Dirty Grandpa and now but he's gotten too big or something?

I've seen this complaint several places across the 'net since these pictures dropped, and I'm on Team Too Big. I'm certainly willing to extend him the benefit of the doubt and believe that this is For The Role a la Anna Faris in The House Bunny - he's clearly going to be playing a beach meathead in this movie. Plus if I was standing next to The Rock I'd go a little psycho about the gym too, I s'pose.

But I'm finding it tough being attracted to someone I wouldn't be able to grab on to because my hands would slide right off of them, causing me to fall on the floor if I tried to make a move. It's like a hot dog dipped in honey. It's too much, Zac!


15 comments:

Alejandra Acosta said...

I know, right! He's quite ripped but I rather have my men a bit softer (not to body-shame Zac, he's gorgeous)

par3182 said...

'too big" - i don't think those words go together

Derreck said...

Paperboy Zac was basically perfect.

Acosted said...

@Alejandra Acosta: Luckily you're too fat/old/ugly/balding to EVER get someone who looks like that to fuck you in the first place, so you probably don't have to worry that a perfect male specimen like would even stand next you let alone talk to you. Guys who look like that only fuck guys who look like that, so you're safe, sweetie. :/

Barry said...

@par3182: Oooo no, she got high standard, watch out now!

rushishi said...

@Derreck: He was a teenager...so yeah, we know what your "predilections" are.

Scot said...

Don't give up on him yet. He seems to be wearing a Red, White and Blue Speedo under those baggy shorts! Those are the pictures I want to see! Indeed, those are the pictures I've been waiting, for years, to see!

Yummy Pizza said...

Are Acosted, Barry and rushini all the same poster? Anyway, @rushini, Paperboy Zac was 25 y/o, you pillock.

As for Zac, I agree. Still hot but hotter just "normally" ripped.

Anonymous said...

Yellow highlights [check!]
Orange tan [check!]
A body that screams "I ate the gym equipment while doing crunches." [check!]

I guess he's basically playing a (very very hot, and possibly dumb) meathead of a lifeguard, you know, like all the hot dudes from Baywatch. I kinda like it. However, it's a far cry from those days when little (literally as in less popping veins) Zac said he'd love to have a career that'd mirror Leo Di Caprio's... As much as I like seeing those abs, I think he deserves a chance at something that doesn't require him to drink a million gallons of protein shake.

MrDarrellmoo said...

As someone who is loves shredded muscles I think Zac's body is bulging perfection to the extreme!! It's pretty damn obvious Zac works long and hard hours on his body and bless his heart for doing so. And let's face it: on some level Zac must know his body is his bread and butter. With out it his career probably would have faded away a long, long time ago.

Anonymous said...

He looks more like a He-Man action figure than a human being nowadays. Not hot. He looked better in Dirty Grandpa.

Glenn said...

Yeah, he doesn't look real. It's kinda gross.

Anonymous said...

He's not that hot in photos but in gifs I want him to fuck me so bad

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-deYi3HlRTJM/Vt8r0B1C-yI/AAAAAAAAHHs/LmYet7K25uw/s1000-Ic42/zac1.gif

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-a8_lFrnaaz0/Vt8sA8LwwbI/AAAAAAAAHH0/w3SaZZIsEUI/s1000-Ic42/zac2.gif

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-jK6uXtGDj00/Vt8p_fbKRAI/AAAAAAAAHHc/hLPdHo4BaC8/s2000-Ic42/zac3.gif

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-KubAktr3DNU/Vt8vaWk8h-I/AAAAAAAAHH8/fT2OAHlLezg/s1000-Ic42/zac4.gif

Anonymous said...


Maybe it's just that ridiculously fake tan that makes him look a bit unnatural. Needles to say he's always been handsome.

Juiced Up said...

On those gifs he looks better