I Am Link

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--- Bale Out - I don't have anything to say about this reported American Psycho remake that Glenn didn't say for me right here. Besides maybe a series of retching noises. Just pretend you hear that in the background as you read Glenn's piece for the full effect.

--- Unleash Hellfest - Neil Marshall, a director you could safely say I am in the bag for after The Descent and Doomsday and Dog Soldiers and Centurion, is making a motherfucking slasher movie next! It's called Hellfest, and it's set at a theme park! Like with roller-coasters and shit! Why don't you just come over here and give me a hand-job, Neil? You obviously want to, but you're shy so you're doing it with this movie, and that's really cool, but I promise I won't bite. You don't have to be nervous.

--- No Boy Oldboy -  No word on the whys and hows and whatnots but Colin Firth has turned down the role of Josh Brolin's antagonist in Spike Lee's version of Oldboy, says Twitch.

--- Wherefore Art Thou Werebear - I'm about halfway through Chillerama on Netflix Instant - anybody watched it? It's a new anthology horror film with four short films, each about a half an hour I think, by four separate directors, and I think what's most notable about it is the inclusion of I Was A Teenage Werebear, an explicitly gay horror story in the middle of all the low-brow gore and mayhem. Not that Werebear is approaching anything remotely high-brow - it wallows in wooden acting and silly gore just like the rest, bless its foul little heart. AICN has an interview with Tim Sullivan who directed that part of the film here.

--- Halleluiah Ally - Jarett got to talk to Allison Janney! Everybody loves Allison Janney, right? I don't know how anyone couldn't love Allison Janney. And Jarett asked her about Drop Dead Gorgeous! Ha!

--- Magneto Attraction - A little bit on a second X-Men Muppet Babies movie from the studio-head here - basically they want to but they need a script! So very exciting news. They better hurry or they won't be able to afford them any Fassy.

--- Green Screens - With his movie The Sitter coming out this weekend - Ari Graynor!!! - we're getting plenty of chats with David Gordon Green popping up, so that equals plenty of chances for him to talk about what he's doing next, and he's still maybe trying to get his remake of Suspiria to happen! SYTD asked him if the similarly themed ballet-horror movie Black Swan with rumored Suspiria-remake star Natalie Portman took any of the wind out of those sails, and he says:

"No, that adds to it. That means there’s an audience for prestige in genre, and to me, that’s exciting. We’re really close to getting that movie made if I can get over a couple more budgetary hurdles I think I can pull it off. My version doesn’t really have any similarities to “Black Swan,” but it proves to the marketplace that you can take a great risk and you can have something that has great artistic ambition, but also has incredible commercial appeal."

--- Alma's Time - Helen Mirren might play Alfred Hitchcock's wife Alma Reville in a movie based off Joseph Rebello's terrific book Alfred Hitchcock and the Making of Psycho. I consider the role of Alma more prestigious than the Queen, so she best do her homework. Alma was an awesome woman. This is the film with Anthony Hopkins as Hitch that we talked about here, not the one with Toby Jones as Hitch and Sienna Miller as Tippi which we just talked about the other day. These are two different movies. Which I'm totally cool with! I could watch movies about Hitchcock's movies every day for the rest of my life.

--- Hey It's Horns - Alexandre Aja, who made the very good save the ending High Tension, the genuinely unsettling Hills Have Eyes remake, and the terrifically bug-nuts Piranha remake, is making something called Horns next, about a dude who wakes up with horns growing out of his head, and becomes convinced the horns have something to do with the unsolved and mysterious death of his girlfriend. That sounds weird.

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