Monday, April 20, 2009

Do Dump or Marry - Buffy's Beaus


What's that? I've somehow never done this one? And here it is, a dozen years since the show ended (okay it's only been six, but it feels like forever and a day) and suddenly I'm squawking the question on exactly nobody's mind anymore? Yeah, that sounds about right.

So imagine this: you've been chosen as the one girl in all the world blah blah blah pointy things blah hell-mouths blah blah three big strapping fellows of various gray-shaded moralities all want up in your business. Who ya picking?

Angel, the vampire with soul

Riley Finn, the classmate with a secret

Spike, the vampire... eventually with a soul, too

So which one gets your eternal life,
which one just gets a single roll in the graveyard,
and who's at the business end of a stake to the heart?



Anonymous said...

Do Angel
Dump Spike
Marry Riley

Yeah, I know. Call me practical.

Jason Adams said...

Thank you for coming out swinging for RIley right out of the gate; I was worried he wouldn't get any love in the usual Angel Vs. Spike show-down... of course, people seem to love one and hate the other with those two meaning Riley would/will probably get tossed more bones than I was anticipating. So to speak.

Anyway, I'd probably marry Riley, do Spike and Dump Angel. Angel seems like he'd be really boring in bed. All that emotional "Oooh we're meant to be," bullshit. Unless he were Angelus, in which case he'd just be really terrifying and probably kill you. No fun either way!

Marsters Man said...

Do Riley

Dump Angel blecch


Joe Reid said...

Do Riley (the Iowa cornfed commando thing would be awesome once before he got all boring an insecure).

Dump Spike (after that schmoopy final season, I can barely look at him).

Marry Angel (he did manage to develop a decent, dorky sense of humor in L.A. Plus he's still looking fine on Boned. Err, Bones).

Ben said...

Do Angelus
Dump Broody Angel
Marry Funny Angel

Anonymous said...

I would do Riley. I love a man that can handle a gun.

I would dump Spike. He never did it for me.

I would definitely marry Angel. He has a soul and he will be eternally beautiful.

DL said...

Most definitely marry Spike.
Do Riley.
Dump whiny, boring Angel.

For a long time (mostly the entire time between Seasons 2 and 6), I was convinced that James Marsters was the true love of my life. As long as we could forget about all that dreck in Season 7, I'd be more than happy to call him my soulmate.

Agnes B said...

Do Riley
Dump Spike
Marry Angel

qta said...

do Riley
Dump spike
Marry angel

Once Riley starts talking...I fin him boring. But he is hot.
Spike has never done it for me . And he stays too negative.
And while Angel does get a bit broody... Wow. He is dreamy.

Anonymous said...

Do Angel, Chiles, Wesley and Jonathan
Dump Spike
Marry Riley and Caleb

Candice said...

Yes! The first response is my exact one as well! Do Angel, dump Spike and Marry Riley.

I do however think that all three of them were too good for Buffy and she didn't deserve a single one of them.

And the only reason it worked out the way it did with Angel vs. Spike is because of 5 years of Angel away from Buffy, god I couldn't stand him in BTVS.

Friend Mouse said...

Do Angel - with the peanut butter and the ice cream ...
Dump Riley - *yawn*
Marry Spike - and do over and over and over again

Glenn said...

Do Angel
Dump Spike
Marry Riley

I never got the (sexual) appeal of Spike.

Karen said...

What about Luke Perry from the movie?

Kristine said...

Doing Angel
Dumping Spike
Marrying Riley

I was kind of torn, but at least with Riley, you don't have to worry about him turning evil.

PK said...

Do Spike, dump Riley, marry Angel. :]

Dale said...

This one's easy.

Do Spike - He has the most sex appeal. Oh, and Angel would get evil and eat me afterwards, so he's totally out of the question.
Dump Riley - Completely boring, and the least hot.
Marry Angel - He's a nice guy but not boring, the relationship would be more stable than one with Spike, and he lightened up a little on the spinoff.

Unknown said...

Everything I hated about Riley on tv (his protectiveness, his alpha maleness, his need to be loverboy numero uno) I would actually want in a mate, plus of the three, Blucas has the most fit/strong/buff hold me at night and make me feel secure after doing it all evening long body, so as much as I hated him, found him least interesting (because, really, supersoldier serum aside, he was the most normal), he's the one I'd marry.

Clearly, Spike was written to be expected to be wild in the sack. Him I do.

Angel is a whiney, broody, flip-flopping friend-ditching verbally abusive bitch and I would totally dump his ass.

Course, given my druthers, I'd take My Darling Wesley over the lot of 'em.

jz said...

Do: Parker Abrams. I'd show him the difference between himself and a toilet seat. And then maybe Scott hope.

Dump: Riley first, Spike next, Principal Wood after that (not that that was going anywhere).

Do, then Marry: Angel, all the way.

Unknown said...

Dump Riley, because my god, he is so boring. I don't care that he's nothing supernatural, it's just his personality that puts me to sleep.

Do Spike - isn't it obvious why? *smirks*

Marry Angel, because he's so adorable - like a puppy! - and I'm hopelessly addicted to angst. Call me crazy, I know I am.

Of course, they all pale in comparison to my Oz. :)