Austin Butler's a Healthy Man

A gratuitous Men's Health photoshoot is the ultimate test of my willpower and so I I think I can finally say with full throated truth today that -- Austin Butler? Does absolutely nothing for me. I've been saying that for the past few years but these sweaty half-naked gray-sweatpanted photos really seal that deal -- he's never gonna do anything for me if these photos are stirring jackshit this morning.

I mean clearly his body is ripped. Shredded, even! I'd give anything to be in this kind of shape just once in my life. But it's not jealousy. It's more... bafflement. I just don't get the appeal. I saw someone on social media say something the other day about him emitting this crazy charisma in person and... okay? I find his entire persona off-putting if we're being honest, which is why I found Ari Aster casting him as a cult leader in Eddington very funny. Because what an empty vacuum to find one's self sucked into.

Which is to say I think he was used well by that movie; I also think Jeff Nichols used him well in The Bikeriders, where his macho man-of-few-words posturing concealed absolutely nothing -- a child. That's also why I don't think he was good in Elvis or Dune Part Two -- those characters needed to actually be more than a blank facade. (Then again with Baz who knows.) Feyd-Rautha though needs to transmit insanity and menace and Butler always felt like a kid playing dress-up. To me. (That said -- Sting wasn't much better. That role has never been cast right.) Anyway! This is all stuff I've said before and I don't mean to stop anyone from enjoying these photos if he stirs something in you. I'm seeing Darren Aronofsky's Caught Stealing next week so maybe... something will stir there. For now hit the jump for what we've got so far...