Wednesday, November 04, 2015

Luke Brings Up The Caboose

Luke Evans, who probably knows something about being the girl on a train, has just joined the cast of The Girl on the Train, replacing Jared Leto who had to bow out because of a schedule conflict. Good riddance to bad rubbish and good afternoon to better. The Girl on the Train -- an adaptation of the best-selling book about some girls and some trains -- has had a lot of people come and go but Emily Blunt, Haley Bennett & Rebecca Fergusen have been pretty constant as cast-members for a bit -- Justin Theroux and Edgar Ramirez are also maybe in it now, which sounds nice to my ears and my eyes! Oh and Lisa effin' Kudrow, too. Have fun on set, Luke! Do everything that I wouldn't do.


mangrove said...

Best Noted Homosexual post ever!

Now I want dear Luke to star in a remake of Maddin's 'Sissy Boy Slap Party'. The bicycle parking especially.

Reboot that sh!t, Hollywood!

Anonymous said...

Who needs gay bashers when mangrove is around to go on the homophobic attack? Disgusting.

Jason Adams said...

FWIW "Sissy Boy Slap Party" is a real movie by the great art-nut director Guy Maddin, and I'd love to see Luke Evans reenact it -- nothing homophobic about it. Pro-homo in fact!

rock hudson's ghost said...

@anon: The one thing you'll learn about being gay fairly early on is that the only people who hate gays more than bigots and fascists are pathetic little insecure self-hating gay men.

So Luke Evans knows about being a girl on a train, what kind of fucking snide bitchy stereotypical shit is that? You sound like someone on FOX news talking about Caitlyn Jenner.

And what the fuck is up with this unmitigated hatred you have for Luke Evans. Is it just another case of gay men hating attractive gay men even though they pathologically fawn over attractive heterosexual men because subconsciously they think straight men are more worthy of their (unwanted) affections or is it something more?

You incessantly spew bile at Luke Evans for "going back into the closet" even though I'm not sure what kind of closeted gay man takes male dates to premiers. But then when the "straight" acting self-hating homosexual Tom Hardy (who's cartoony impersonation of what he things a straight man is includes hanging around muscular black guys, getting a ton of garbage tattoos and being into boxing and "manly sport" ala Justin Bieber) backtracks on his admission of loving to ride dick and does so in a homophobic and needlessly angry way, all that does is make your "pussy" drool even more?

Why the resentful hatred for the gay man who is gay but doesn't talk about it because Matt Damon and studios execs and apparently movie audiences feel it's better for gay men in Hollywood to practice "don't ask, don't tell" but for the "straight" Tom Hardy who thinks homosexuality is disgusting and unnatural and speaks about the comments he made in the early '90s with such vitriolic contempt and talks about gay sex and two men being together with such repulsion, this gay man gets put on a pedestal and gets idolized by you posting numerous photos of his beady eyes and crooked teeth on a weekly basis? Oh but I forget, he's "straight" which is hot, so who cares. Right, Jason?

Yummy Pizza said...

Dear lord. I totally missed all the hate in your post, Jason! Must be wearing the wrong glasses.

Mmm, Luke. Mmm, Hardy.

mangrove said...

I must say I completely missed the part where referencing Maddin's reworking of gay porn loops and drooling over little Luke's physique was homophobic. o_O

Must be something wrong with my gayness.

Jason Adams said...

Sheesh yeah I actively tried to be nice and not mean to Luke this time out (I didn't even use to term "Noted Homosexual" for goodness sake) -- so what if I insinuated gay sex? I have lots and lots of gay sex and don't see anything wrong with gay sex. I quite like it! I only used the words "girl" and "train" to play with stereotypes and the title and be playful.