I Kissenstein

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Hey there everybody! So I am off for the next few days to make with some terribly belated holiday visitings, so you'll have to make do without MNPP til... oh let's say Tuesday. We'll say Tuesday, because it is indeed Tuesday that we mean. Funny how that works. Anyway yeah y'all have a great next few days, there's Aaron Eckhart and Thomas Jane kissing to keep you company, and bye.

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Big Belgian Big Country

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While I'm always happy to hear about my favorite big n' beefy Belgian Matthias Schoenaerts getting a new big n' beefy leading gig, I'd probably be more enthusiastic about this one if the behind-the-scenes credentials weren't center-square on my shit list this week - he's signed on to star in Galveston, which was written by Nic Pizzolatto; Pizzolatto's adapting his own book actually. Pizzolatto is the "creator, writer, showrunner and exec producer" of HBO's True Detective, which as y'all know I was really looking forward to thanks to the participation of the director Cary Fukunaga, but as I admitted on Twitter just yesterday I am having a helluva hard time getting into the show. It's just all coming off as so forced - total poseur tee-vee. Woody Harrelson's not bad (Woody's almost always good) but Mumbles McConaughey grates, and it's not entirely his fault - the dialogue he's given makes me want to drive railroad spikes through my eardrums. Anyway that's my long way of getting to my biggest problem with the show is its writing, and so hearing Matthias has signed on to spout this dude's lines is giving me pause. Also the story's centered on a Texan named Roy "Big Country" Cady (ugh that name, it's already so much empty dick waving) and I'm a little worried about Matty diving into that accent.
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Five Frames From ?

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What movie is this?

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All of Them Whores

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As if her acting wasn't enough of a reason to hate Sienna Miller, now comes word that she cheated on Jude Law with Daniel Craig, while Daniel Craig was also in a relationship. She says she cheated because Jude cheated. Oh whatever, I don't hate her for all the cheating. I just hate her for getting to go to town on both Jude Law and Daniel Craig. And the way they're all making it sound she was practically bouncing from one's lap to the other's. It's obvious what Jude and Dan need to do to get back at her, right? I think you know what I'm thinking. Come on you guys! It's only fair and right!

Pic of the Day

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As if offering an antidote to yesterday's semi-grody cover image of Hugh Jackman without a shirt on (yay) but riddled with bullet holes (nay) here's a shot from inside the magazine of him without a shirt (yay) with no bullet holes in him (continued yay). You can see some more new pictures from the new X-Men over here. Back to this picture though - let's speculate who's the dude opposite Hugh in the mirror that he's flexing for? The pizza delivery guy? His "personal assistant"? The guy who delivers the checks to Deb down in her own separate apartment? I do wonder.

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Good Morning, World

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When I posted pictures of Enlisted stars Geoff Stults and Parker Young sharing a shower yesterday morning I mentioned a third brother played by Chris Lowell but I never gave us a picture of Chris, so here's me rectifying. With tighty-whities, no less!

Piz! Yes he also played Piz on Veronica Mars. Or rather he plays Piz, seeing as how he's in the upcoming movie. I still can't believe there's a Veronica Mars movie. They just released a list of theaters the movie will be playing in when it comes out on March 14th. Anyway we have indeed posted pictures of Chris before - see this old gratuitous post from 2007. 

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Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

Frances Ha (2013)

Benji: Let's do something fun. 

We could go to a movie. 

Frances: Movies are so expensive now. 

Benji: Yeah, but you're at the movies. 

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Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... stuffing James Wolk's face.

(pics via)

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Five Frames From ?

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What movie is this?

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To Xavier's Farm We Go

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It was just a couple of weeks ago that I last posted about Xavier Dolan's upcoming flick Tom at the Farm when I spied with my little eye Dolan's pretty co-star Pierre-Yves Cardinal; well I don't know how I missed this at the time but there's also been a clip from the movie online, which involves wrestling and spitting in mouths and yeah just watch it:

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Still no word on when this is getting a US release but have no doubt we'll be on the case til the day it's all up on us like Pierre's all up on Xavier in that clip. Until then I suppose we can take a moment after the jump to stare at some new-ish pictures of Xav since he's got to be one of if not the most photographed directors working today. I mean talent aside, would you rather look at Martin Scorsese's mug? I thought not.

Who Wore It Best?

A Manly Cry Unto The Heavens?

Tim Robbins in The Shawshank Redemption or

Thomas Jane in The Mist?
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poll by twiigs.com

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A happy 55th birthday to Frank Darabont today!
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John Krasinski Nine Times

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(via)

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I Am Link

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--- Buggin Out - First off, a happy birthday to Elijah Wood today! Next up, so reviews from Sundance are still trickling in over at The Film Experience, thank goodness - it was kind of hard to keep up with them all while the fest was going on so it's good to have some time to breathe with them; first up check out what Glenn has to say on a pair of horror comedies - the schoolchildren-zombie flick Cooties (we already admired its great retro poster here), which stars birthday boy Elijah Wood, and the vampire mockumentary What We Do in the Shadows from Flight of the Conchords' Jermaine Clement.

--- Thumb Way Up - And then here's Michael C. on the movie that played Sundance that I'm most looking forward t slash dreading (dreading because it's gonna mess me up) - the doc from Hoop Dreams' Steve James on Roger Ebert called Life Itself. Seriously, I'm gonna have to go to this movie by myself, I'll be such a wreck. I still miss Ebert so so much.

---  Zero Stars - The first trailer for Terry Gilliam's new movie Zero Theorem popped up online the other day, you can watch it here. It stars Christoph Waltz, Ben Whishaw, Tilda Swinton... and a bunch of other people but those are the ones that matter. It doesn't have a release date here in the US yet.

--- Green Pastures - And here's the first trailer for David Gordon Green's upcoming movie Joe, which stars Nicolas Cage (I know, I know) and Tye Sheridan as an ex-con and a troubled kid (guess who plays who!) who bond - they say it's sort of a Western, although it mixes genres, which makes sense, seeing as how it's a David Gordon Green movie. So glad Green's making small movies again.

--- Accusing Allen - The man who made the comprehensive Woody Allen documentary from a few years ago has written a piece about the molestation allegations Woody faced back in the day which have reared their head up again as of late because of Mia Farrow and her son Ronan's tweets during the Golden Globes - he details the facts in the case, which have gotten pretty foggy with time; I was unsure about a lot of it myself.

--- X Many - Normally I'd be more enthusiastic about a new shirtless Hugh Jackman picture on the cover of a magazine but the multiple gunshot wounds really kinda kill that momentum in its tracks. Empire magazine released like 25 new covers of their X-Men issue with everybody and their half-mutant brother getting one, see 'em all here. I maintain that Evan Peters looks kinda silly.

--- Come Closer - I forgot to mention this last week when it was announced but Edgar Wright's Ant Man has gotten moved closer to us thanks to the Batman Vs. Superman movie being delayed - good news all around! Ant Man will come out on July 17th 2015 now, two weeks earlier than planned.

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Quote of the Day

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"For me, Jurassic Park was really kind of my Star Wars. I lined up at the theater to see it, I saw it opening night, I saw every sequel, I’ve seen it a whole bunch of times… for me that was my big movie, I think I was 13 or 14 when it came out. And so it’s a big deal for me to be any part of that, let alone this part I’m going to be playing. I’m thrilled about it."

That's Chris Pratt finally confirming that he's going to star in the fourth Jurassic Park movie, which is called Jurassic World, and in the process pretty much echoing exactly how I feel about the Jurassic Park movies. I'm two years older than him, but yeah, I went to that movie opening night and then every single night for the week after. As if I needed any more reason to love Chris. I need to become the nanny to his kid with Anna Faris. How does one apply for that job? I must have it. And no it's not what your thinking I wouldn't be the slutty nanny that sleeps with the dad, I would never ever ruin their marriage, it makes me too happy with the world. I might "accidentally" walk in on him when he's showering, but I wouldn't touch! (gif via)

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Good Morning, World

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I knew, or at least I hoped, as soon as I saw the subway posters for the new Fox military comedy Enlisted that it might turn out to be a buffet of beefcake given the fact that its stars - Geoff Stults, Parker Young and Chris Lowell - haven't exactly been shy in the past. Sure enough just a few episodes in and they've gotten the boys disrobed a few times, up to and including the shot seen above with Stults and Young seen cozying up in the shower stall. I believe they're playing brothers? Just put a check-mark next to all the kinds of dirty business, show. 

Anyway once I started I got on a Geoff Stults kick, realizing I'd never posted any pictures of him before even though his job seems to consist of bouncing from show to show just long enough to take his top off, so if you hit the jump you'll see multiple examples of this.

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... bosom buddies with Adam Scott & Paul Rudd.

The latest "Greatest Event In Television History" arrived the other day, this time around with Paul Rudd and Adam Scott re-enacting the opening credits sequence from Bosom Buddies, offering up a whole lot of those two in Eighties-era shorts shorts and less. It's not as amazing as the one where Amy Poehler made all those faces doing Hart to Hart, but it's pretty funny.

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Five Frames From ?

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What movie is this?

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Who Wore It Best?

Gettin' Frisky with Frosty?

Sharon Tate in Playboy for The Fearless Vampire Killers

or Shannon Elizabeth in Jack Frost?

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poll by twiigs.com

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Chiwetel Ejiofor Ten Times

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