Zoe Saldana Is Going To Vidal Sassoon

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Back at the start of December came word that NBC was in the "drugging and raping young girls" business and were moving forward with their Rosemary's Baby remake. Agnieszka Holland, the woman who directed Europa Europa and Olivier Olivier (waiting for this to be renamed Rosemary Rosemary) is at the helm, and the whole thing's taking place in France. James Wong, an X-Files writer (he wrote one of greatest hours of television of all time - the incest under a bed one called "Home") who then went on to shepherd about half of my beloved Final Destination series, is co-writing the super fun-time antichrist adventure.

I'm burying the lede here - Avatar actress (and Uhura herself) Zoe Saldana is primed to slip into Mia Farrow's maternity nightgown (and in return have a lil' devil dick slipped her way) in the four-hour miniseries. She's being given a co-producer credit too, so you know when this abomination opens up a nightmare fissure in the world itself we can feel comfortable laying more than plenty of the blame on Zoe and using her as our sacrifice to the angry gods because she got that second paycheck and earned it.

In all seriousness, I don't really have anything against Saldana though. Rosemary's Baby being my favorite movie of all time, I'm prone to find this project one hundred thousand percent folly, but they certainly could have made a worse choice for their inevitably doomed Rosemary. What do y'all think?
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