I Am Link

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--- The Black Queen - I can't tell whether this picture, billed by STYD as the first look at Angelina Jolie playing the wicked queen Maleficent in the movie of that name, is an actual photo of her in costume and make-up or if it's just a drawing, can you? If it's a photo it's retouched enough that the distinction hardly matters, anyway. But I like the look! It's creepy and sexy and Jolie-y, as it should be. I hope she nails this, I love the idea of it. We need more bitch queens in our lives. Charlize got the ball rolling.

--- Taped Delay - I won't be watching this myself, I'm keeping myself as spoiler-free as possible before seeing the movie in a couple of weeks, but the red-band trailer for the buzzy horror anthology V/H/S is out and you can see it over here. Everybody everywhere says it looks scary.

--- Sexy Beast - Stripper du jour Alex Pettyfer has joined the cast of Lee "Precious" Daniels next movie called The Butler, which has already a massive cast ranging from Forrest Whitaker and Oprah Winfrey to Minka Kelley and Cuba Gooding Jr. No word on whether anybody pees on Alex's character or not, but my money's on Forrest. He's freaky.

--- Ship Mate - As long rumored, Jennifer Connolly is going to play Noah's wife in Darren Aronofsky's movie about the notorious biblical boat-boy. I assume she took her time getting on board because she had to get the right cocktail of pills that would keep her from choking the life out of eternal pain-in-the-ass Russell Crowe.

--- Porn Star - I have no idea who Paul Raymond is but there are dueling bio-pics being made about him, and the second one just gained Tom Hiddleston as its star so my curiosity's peaked - he is according to that link a "British pornographer and smut house proprietor," which sounds fun. The first bio-pic, which ahs apparently already been filmed, is from director Michael Winterbottom and stars Steve Coogan, which is much better casting as far as I can tell from pictures than the lithe dandy Hiddleston. But we like that lithe dandy, and we especially like thinking of him associated with smut.

--- Jungle Pouch - Looks like Warner Bros. is serious about making a Tarzan movie and they've got a few directors in mind, including The Hunger Games' Gary Ross and Harry Potter's David Yates. Ross' participation only underscores how casting the titular ape-man hero will involve the most heated discussion over hot guys in loincloths since the ongoing Finnick Odair debate.
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