Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Chloe Moretz Burns In Hell


I'm not even going to say anything about the news that Chloe Moretz has been officially offered the lead in Kimberly Pierce's remake of Carrie (supposedly chosen over the extremely capable Haley Bennett, at that) because what could I say really? It's just so far over the line at this point all I can do is laugh. Why don't they just go and hire my arch-nemesis Thandie Newton to play her mother and get it over with? So I leave it to y'all.


Anonymous said...

Why do you hate Chloe Moretz and Thandie Newton so much? Not that I disagree, but I only just started reading your blog (which I adore!) and so I missed the reasons why.

Jason Adams said...

Basically I just think they're both awful at what they do. But there's also a totally irrational aspect to it, where sometimes somebody just triggers something bad inside of you, you know? I try not to harp on it too much because it's not really fair to them but OH MY GOD THEY ARE JUST THE WORST. Ahem.

Anonymous said...

I definitely understand. It's the same way my sister feels about Emma Watson and Claire Danes; especially Emma. She can actually tolerate Claire since she watched My So Called Life. The vehemence of her aversion is sometimes scary, but whenever I ask her why she doesn't like them, all she can say is that they "bother" her. I think I like the way you phrased it better, though.

Jee Jay said...

The poll is short a few choices.
Suggested additions:

The remake of Carrie will be...

- never made at all
- dumped direct to video oblivion
- forgotten within 6 months of release
- only sought out by masochists

The Pretentious Know it All said...

Ugh. This is just...ugh. The great thing about Sissy Spacek is that even when she was young (as pretty as she was) she was always a little...off-putting. There was something a little slightly askew about her that really made it believable that all these girls in her school would pick on her.

Who is going to buy Chloe Moretz as the ugly, downtrodden high school reject that needs a pity date to the prom? And she's so cloying and precious. I get why people like her, but I definitely catch her "acting" in every single movie. I just can't...I cannot.

On an unrelated note, JA, have you seen the Carrie TV movie from about ten years back? Stars Angela Bettis (anorexic Janet from Girl, Interrupted ) as Carrie and Patricia Clarkson as Mrs. White.

Jason Adams said...

It's been awhile but yeah I saw the Bettis version way back when. It was far better than it had any right to be (I do love Angela Bettis), but compared to DePalma's film... yeah notsomuch. I really just consider the 1976 film a perfect thing (give or take that dopey "Trying on tuxes!" montage) with a pair of the greatest horror film (slash film, period) performances ever given, and it seems to entirely pointless to keep revisiting a story that done been told as well as it's ever gonna get told. There are so many other stories, man!

Scot said...

Have they chosen an actor to play Tommy Ross? Have you?
Zac still gets my vote for prom king.

Cinesnatch said...

What JA said in comment #2, especially the part that they're just awful at what they do. I wish more people felt that way and voiced their opinion.

I find the manner in which CM whores herself out on the red carpet to be most unbecoming and gross for a ... how old is she? She should decide if she is a kid or a sex-pot and just pick one already. Because she can't negotiate the territory in between, if that's even possible.

Sorry, new commenter here.

Erich Kuersten said...

I love Chloe but agree she's wrong... too confident. Dakota Fanning would be better as she seems to have slid into that vacant empty side pocket of adolosence.-- Maybe Chloe will do the same by the time shooting starts?? The thing with 'teen' actors is they may be super confident when you start shooting but then fall apart and destroy your movie, the way Dakota kind of damaged parts of The Runaways. Oh well, we'll always have Sissy

Chris said...

"which CM whores herself out on the red carpet"

You're a class act, Cinesnatch.