Thursday, February 09, 2012

Thomas Kretschmann One Time


So who watched The River? I know its ratings weren't great so the answer's probably "Nobody!" I only got around to it last night, and forgive me Kretschmann but I thought it was pretty terrible. All over the place with the stealing from Lost and Paranormal Activity with no nuance to it - you're just not allowed to do black smoke rumbling through palm trees! God! - and the "found footage" aspect of it was poorly done to the point of distraction - as hard as they try to force it, there are about a thousand moments where a camera capturing a moment makes absolutely no sense at all.

It had a couple of moments that sort of creeped me out - any time any where you make a bug crawl in somebody's sleeping mouth you are gonna get me - but those were far, far outweighed by the obvious groan-worthy efforts - a baby doll turning its head? Really, show? American Horror Story could get away with that because it's intentionally awful over-the-top everything-referential, but not you.

Still, it has Thomas Kretschmann and Joe Anderson - not to mention Sin Nombre's wonderful Paulina Gaitan, who will hopefully get more to work with than Subtitled Doomsayer - so I will keep with it. But I hope they pull their shit together. Meaning more of this:



Unknown said...

Yea, I was disappointed as well. I hope it gets better. I HAVE to keep watching , though. I mean, how often is it that we can see NEW Kretschmann once a week ?!?!

Prospero said...

Worst. New show. Ever.