Monday, January 16, 2012

A Hack For Hack/Slash?

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It's been a very long time since we've heard anything about the proposed movie version of the comic book series Hack/Slash. The series, created by Tim Seeley, tells the fictional (a-duh) story of final girl survivor Cassie Hack and how she turns the tables on the world's slasher killers - think Jason Voorhees or Michael Myers - by hunting them down and slaughtering them herself. It's basically Dexter starring a hyper sexualized tough girl. They've been yammering about making a movie of it for years and years - the series started in 2004, and is on-going. The last post I can find on it here is this one, wherein I link to an article about how Kat Dennings wanted to play Cassie, which I thought was a great idea. (And I still do, for the record, even if I can't bring myself to watch that sitcom she's on.) 

Yadda yadda there's new news. The director Marcus Nispel has decided he would like to make the movie. We were just vilifying his remake of Friday the 13th a couple of days ago, what a coincidence! Besides that generally atrocious film, Nispel is known for the supposedly atrocious Conan the Barbarian movie with Jason Momoa that just flopped a few months ago (I still haven't seen it), and the actually not awful remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre that came out in 2003. You know, the one with all this awesomeness in it:



But those aren't the only reasons the film isn't terrible (although they certainly help) - it's one of the spate of remakes in the 2000s that actually scared me. There was a brutality to it that worked. I'm not saying it's a modern masterpiece like Tobe Hooper's film, but as a horror movie on its own I liked the 2003 version well enough.

And it's because of that movie that I was alright with Nispel making a Friday the 13th movie, but that did not work out at all. The problem there was nobody making the movie seemed to have any interest in actually making it a Friday the 13th film - Nispel copied all his tricks from TCM, and they didn't translate. Critics love to lump them all together, but Jason and Leatherface are actually very different creatures.

I digress. I think Cassie Hack's world is pliable enough that Nispel might be able to do what he wants with it, without getting hung up on the dreariness that's seemed to smother him with Jason Voorhees and apparently Conan too. (Sidenote: Dear lord look at that picture of Jason Momoa I just found.)

From what I've read of Hack/Slash - just the first omnibus - the tone is all over the place, depending on what sort of killer she's duking it out with. I love the idea of several mini-slashers all in one story anyway, and I hope the movie's made eventually.With or without Nispel. Although if he does end up making it hopefully he will stay away from his TCM star Jessica Biel for the role. No thank you, Marcus! I have had enough of her for a lifetime. If you need to work with somebody you've worked with, I bet Rose McGowan can still kick some ass.
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1 comment:

Dale said...

So, what's the deal with these books, if I might ask? I've been curious about reading them because it looks like Allison Scagliotti might play Cassie in the film adaptation and I like her and would like to see her in stuff. But then, it also sounds like it might just be a sexist geekboy fantasy, basically what everyone assumed Sucker Punch was, and I think that would put a damper on my enjoyment a bit.