Do Dump or Marry - Boogie Boys

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I was looking up pictures of Thomas Jane this morning to help wish the man a happy 42nd birthday today when I stumbled upon that wonderful picture of him with Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Mark Wahlberg on the set of Boogie Nights which I'd never seen before. Now there's a Do Dump or Marry for ya! As their characters of course. They are...

Dirk Diggler (Mark Wahlberg)

"You don't know what I can do! You don't know what I can do, what I'm gonna do, or what I'm gonna be! I'm good! I have good things and you don't know about! I'm gonna be something! I am! And don't fucking tell me I'm not!"

Scotty J (Phillip Seymour Hoffman)

"I'm a fuggin' idiot. I'm a fuggin' idiot.
Fuggin' idiot, fuggin' idiot, fuggin' idiot..."

Todd Parker (Thomas Jane)

"Who's 'vette is that out in the driveway? That shit's jammin', man. Start down low with a 350 cube, three and a quarter horsepower, 4-speed, 4:10 gears, ten coats of competition orange, hand-rubbed lacquer with a huplane manifold, Full fuckin' race cams. Whoo!"

I know, I know this isn't exactly all that fair to Scotty, one of the most pathetic and unappealing people ever put onto film. I suppose it'd help him out if you keep in mind that he's the only one that doesn't become a drug-ruined psychopath...? Anyway tell me in the comments which of these three you'd wanna funk with just the one time, which you'd hitch your customized van to for the long road, and which gnarly cheeto would have to get bent, ya dig?
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