Thursday, June 10, 2010

The Greatest Movie...

... made by women about women and men getting made dead
by a man for men and women who enjoy that sort of thing (with tits)?

The Slumber Party Massacre (1982)

Oh what does one say about a film like The Slumber Party Massacre? Well let's start with what I tweeted last night after I finished it:

"A love affair was born tonight. How had I never watched Slumber Party Massacre til now? AMAZING."

Yes, a love affair. See, around the time you're suffering through what feels like hour twelve of some inanity like Silent Night, Deadly Night 2 you begin to ask yourself: is this slasher-love I harbor worth it anymore? Are there any left worth seeing, or have I plunged so far down, well past the original Halloweens and Texas Chain Saw Massacres, past the My Bloody Valentines and Black Christmases, into a horrible place where every single slasher left feels like torture? Will I ever find another one to enjoy again?

Make no mistake, Slumber Party Massacre is not on the level of any of the four films I just mentioned. But it's fun! So much fun. It hops along briskly - yeah it's only 77 minutes long but believe me I have sat through plenty of slashers the same length that've felt 20 times as long - and never takes itself too seriously and all the time pokes some fun at the genre - it was written by feminist author Rita Mae Brown and directed by Amy Holden Jones, also a lady, as well! - while at the same time indulging in the genre's staples to, one might say, an obscene degree. It's like the Brown and Jones were all, you want boobs and ass? We'll give you boobs and ass! Thirty varieties, with lingering close-ups! You want a sleazy killer with a penetration fetish? We'll give you a driller killer with a 16 incher!

Speaking of his drill, time-line wise this movie falls directly between Abel Ferrara's 1979 The Driller Killer and Brian Depalma's 1984's Body Double (more on that one here) and the drill's length falls right in the middle of those two movies' extreme visions of men plunging drills into ladies too!

Size does matter! At least when we're talking about something, you know, that's ripping open your insides.

Anyway the glory of this movie's hard to put into words. You just have to see it and ride the ride. But about thirty times I shouted at the screen that the image I was looking at needs to be a banner for this here site, which tells me I should go ahead and grab a bunch of random pictures from the movie to share, because it's just all so delightfully silly I can't help myself. Love.

Also, the two pervy yet harmless teen guys that follow the girls around, spy on their slumber party, and end up being useless in the end (oh big spoiler there)? They couldn't have been shot in a gayer way if there'd been anal penetration.



shaun said...

I CANNOT believe that this was your first time at this particular rodeo. I own and love this movie. It is so cheesy in all the right ways. Also, somehow, I actually found myself caring for these women. The gym teacher would actually make my "one I would have saved" list, and she barely has a single line. There are some great kills, too -- the one with the first student to go (the one killed at school) is quite tense and well done. Love it!

Anonymous said...

I haven't seen Slumber Party, but I did see SP 2 years ago with a friend and there was a scene in that thing that when it was done, we just looked at each other with our mouths hanging open and we pretty much said the same time, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!!! I`ve posted a link to YouTube, I hope it works...

Jason Adams said...

shaun - I can't believe it took me this long either. And yes, on top of being fun it really is a fairly well made movie, as far as these things go. It's got some really terrific shots and there are def. sequences, like the one you mention, that are tense. I know he and his jean jacket get made fun of but I really like the way the killer is just a sleazeball boiled down to that essence. Essence d'Sleaze, if you will. He doesn't need a mask or a jumpsuit, he's just any creepy greasy dude you see on the street. And he just walks up to the girls and sticks them! That part freaked me out, esp. in that scene you mention towards the start - there wasn't that much build to his attack. He just walked right up to the girl and tried to stick his drill in her. No slow stalking for him. It threw me off, in a good way.

anon - SPM2 is on my list to watch next so I'm gonna hold off on watching that clip, but I've heard it's nothing like the original, as in it totally stinks. At least now you've given me hope that there's one WTF moment to make it worthwhile! ;-)

Adam said...

"Slumber Party Massacre 2" is even more up my alley, in that it's dreadful but completely hilarious. The third was is worth it just to see how bafflingly inept it is. But Part 2 is a must see, especially since the little sister who gets off with a sucker and a Sly Stallone Playgirl is the main star, played by Helen from TV's "Wings." It really is the best kind of crap.