Wednesday, June 28, 2006

The Kutcher Conundrum

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Woe is me... why can't I resist the lure of the Kutcher? He offends my very being, yet... yet... I see a picture of him shirtless and dozens of dirty thoughts race through my brain before I can even hit the brakes and tell myself, no, NO, it's the Kutcher!

And even then, I still can't stop staring!

He's like some sort of test, placed here on Earth, to see if I'm worthy. Worthy for what, though? What is this mad, Kutcher-laced plot against me? WHAT HAVE I DONE??? What must I do? I don't understand! Send me a sign, spill a bunch of Dude, Where's My Car? DVDs on the sidewalk as I pass that spell out a message... something! Anything! I can't take it any longer!!!

(this existential crisis has been brought to me by Towleroad)
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2 comments:

Glenn Dunks said...

He's definitely bulked up since picking up with Demi, that's for sure.

StinkyLulu said...

I watched The Butterfly Effect and liked it. I'm forever lost in the strange & idiotic force of Kutcher...