Dunno why I can't get the phrase "Throw some shrimp on the Bar-B" out of my head. I think I can probably blame that Dukes of Hazzard trailer where Seann William Scott says it. Everything that's wrong with this world can be traced back to one of the stars of Dukes of Hazzard, you know. It's true. Just think about it. Blows the mind a little.
Speaking of Seann William Scott, has anyone seen the newest issue of Men's Fitness with him on the cover? It's a photographic abortion. His head just keeps getting weirder and smaller and more f-d up every time I see him. And he appears to be going bald so he's doing the Ashton Kutcher thing (see below) of growing his hair out too long and parting it in a weird place trying to cover it up, and it just does not flatter his weird, weird head shape at all. And then, it's a Men's Fitness cover, right? Pointless rag who's only reason for existing is to show "workout models" doing squat thrusts. And Seann William Scott's only bearable asset, his beautifully crafted torso, is completely covered up. What the hell is he doing on the cover of Men's Fitness and only showing off that flip-top head of his? I'll never understand. And don't think I haven't noticed that Johnny Knoxville gets the cover of Genre magazine, SWS gets Men's Fitness, and effing Jessica Simpson gets the cover of GQ. Huh? And what's with Genre having a super-hot picture of Johnny Knoxville in their layout, with his hands down his pants whilst auto-asphyxiating himself, and they warp the image sideways and make it the size of a postage stamp? I want a two-page layout of that shit! Hear me, Genre? You have thirty pages of ads for lube and you can't give me one reasonable hot shot of your cover boy?
Sigh. I am incredibly bored today, and I'm in some sort of antihistamine fog and can't think straight. You have now borne witness to my drug stupor.
Speaking of Seann William Scott, has anyone seen the newest issue of Men's Fitness with him on the cover? It's a photographic abortion. His head just keeps getting weirder and smaller and more f-d up every time I see him. And he appears to be going bald so he's doing the Ashton Kutcher thing (see below) of growing his hair out too long and parting it in a weird place trying to cover it up, and it just does not flatter his weird, weird head shape at all. And then, it's a Men's Fitness cover, right? Pointless rag who's only reason for existing is to show "workout models" doing squat thrusts. And Seann William Scott's only bearable asset, his beautifully crafted torso, is completely covered up. What the hell is he doing on the cover of Men's Fitness and only showing off that flip-top head of his? I'll never understand. And don't think I haven't noticed that Johnny Knoxville gets the cover of Genre magazine, SWS gets Men's Fitness, and effing Jessica Simpson gets the cover of GQ. Huh? And what's with Genre having a super-hot picture of Johnny Knoxville in their layout, with his hands down his pants whilst auto-asphyxiating himself, and they warp the image sideways and make it the size of a postage stamp? I want a two-page layout of that shit! Hear me, Genre? You have thirty pages of ads for lube and you can't give me one reasonable hot shot of your cover boy?
Sigh. I am incredibly bored today, and I'm in some sort of antihistamine fog and can't think straight. You have now borne witness to my drug stupor.
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